Life of a Bear

2010-12-25T07:15:00.000-08:00

today is Christmas... so first of all, i want to say to everyone, "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" :D

Yes, today is Christmas.. but it doesn't feel so right. When everyone come together, somehow it doesn't seem feel the way its supposed to be. The closeness, the happiness, the laughter... It seems like the crowd is always so far so far away. It just seem like there isn't a common topic.

Looking at the kids laughing and yeah communicating with no barrier, I suddenly remembered the times when we were young: We played, laughed and talked happily. Yeah, we were so bonded together. But as time passed, this cousinship just seem to drift further and further apart. This feeling... is just so.. erm sad, lonely.

I realised I don't know how to socialise anymore. ): I really really really wished that I am able to speak. yeah and think(?). AH WELL. life is like that.

anyways, hope my bro can really get well soon. yeah he is sick again (or maybe not again.. it just got worse). so worried. but yeah i still dunno what to say. (RAWR. I really need to learn how to talk.)

well. I just HOPE EVERYTHING will CHANGE for the BETTER. ^^

yeah. merry. christmas. everyone! (:

2010-12-15T04:24:00.000-08:00

Deep inside, he is always suffering. Fighting a battle by himself. I want to help. But I don't know how. Sometimes I wanna distract his thoughts by talking about random stuff. But what returns was a speechless reply. Seriously, I am not a good advicer, not a good listener. I can't console people, neither do I really understand what they really want. It seems that the distance between me and him... is enlarging. There are too many question marks about what he really feel, really wants. Even though I have no idea what he is going through, what kind of battle is he fighting inside, I know he is really going through alot.

I want to help.But I just don't know how. It hurts me when I see him bursting out into tears, yet unable to explain why. He just said, "I am feeling very terrible." I don't know what to reply, so I stoned. Its not like I don't care or I am not concern... in fact, I am very worried. Its just... I don't know what to do to help.

I said that he was fighting a battle by himself. Maybe not exactly. I believe he understand that dad, mum, I and his friends are always behind him to support him. Even though I don't know how, I just want him to know that if he feels lonely or terrible, I am always there to listen to you, talk to you. Even though I don't know how,I will try. :D

Jiayou bro!~ x)you will win! I believe in you.

2010-10-26T08:11:00.000-07:00

WAT THE!! can you..please do your part properly cann!!! D: STOP SENDING THE WRONG STUFF!!!!! just CONCENTRATE!! D:

2010-10-26T07:59:00.000-07:00

its not like we are not going through this together. but why are you all so irresponsible. we are all tired. i understand, so am i. but why isit that i have remind you all again and again, chase you all again and again just to get you to do your part and sent them in time. please have more initiative and do your part please. here i am staying up late, without being able to rest in the afternoon. there you are taking your nice nap in the afternoon, and still complaining that you are tired and need to sleep now. I am also EXHAUSTED. But why isit that you all do not feel the responsibility to complete and pull yourself through this together as a group. I did not sleep last week for a day. but i did not complain. the effort we are all putting in now is what we ultimately will get later on. i don't know why i am wasting my time over here. but i am just super irritated and need to ventilate now. so please please cooperate. ARGH. can you all please just hang in there and cheng xia qu! i beg you! ><

2010-08-14T06:43:00.000-07:00

i hate these sudden unstoppable outbursts of coughs. D: totally cannot stop. until stomach aches.

2010-08-12T06:44:00.000-07:00

its surprising how people change over time.

2010-07-13T07:00:00.001-07:00

for some reason, i found myself in a situation, uncontrollable.

it began feww months ago where i am told to adjust my coursework to suit the theme friendship. I cracked my brain for many weeks, and finally crapped out something with substance. Upon submittion, i was relieved that it was over, and thrown away all memories about this coursework.

Few months later, i received a call. I received a prize. I WAS excited. but soon excitement turned into fear and i found myself freaking out and panicking. I realised. that i am suppose to present on my coursework.

I dunno how to do so. I forgot how this coursework came about, not to say answer any questions that anyone would probably ask. I decided... that I am dead.

Few days later, I received another call (just). A more terrible call than the previous. it says that i am selected for....
...
press interview.

At that point of time my heart SCREAMED... i freaked out. I am already worried about the presentation and now something even more serious. My world collasped and shattered.

What have i gotten myself into. Probably to others, they would be more than willing to accept this "joyous moment" but to me, someone who cannot articulate her thoughts well, someone who is quiet, someone who hates public speaking, someone who just cannot speak, this task is crazy. Insane.

AHH.. D:

Now, I just have to settle my mood. and prepare for the worst.... hope the day never comes. T_T

2010-05-04T06:56:00.000-07:00

GP essay test tmr!! D: sian damn sick of assignments and work.

2010-05-04T06:55:00.000-07:00

i got a feeling she hates me. D: haih
feel neglected by them D: haih

2010-04-17T21:08:00.000-07:00

Received my piano exam results on saturday!! YAY I PASSED!!! with MERIT!!! WOOH first time man.. (: haha.. (just kinda of sad cos 3 more marks to distinction) but YAY i am still happy! wat kinda of shock me most was the aural.. haha i dun even know how to answer alot of the questions before the exam. (and during the exam) ... so i anyhow ans and i got a very high mark for aural. o_o so tyco!! hope grd 8 exam will also be tt tyco and lucky! :D

2010-04-13T05:22:00.000-07:00

how to tell this to my parents when my bro had sth similar to me. one is alrdy worrying enough, costly enough. how. i dun wan life to end like tt.

2010-04-13T05:21:00.001-07:00

i don't want suspicious growths D:haih.

2010-04-01T17:51:00.000-07:00

我很久很久没到这里了。

这次来到这儿，心情不像往日一样。

看到朋友勇敢地面对挑战，我心里感到欣慰。但就因为如此，我突然觉得自己很懦弱，因为，我无法面对我现在所需要面对的事。从去年起，我告诉我自己：不管怎么样，今年我一定要接受事实，去检查。如今，我还是无法鼓起勇气告诉我的父母亲，告诉他们我的生命中出现了一粒坏东西。我也没勇气告诉其他人，即使是朋友，我也无法说出口。

记得有一次，我突然想起这件事，泪水就不禁从我眼眶里流出。我怕。害怕面对着背后所带来的事实，所以我一次再一次地逃避。

另一位朋友，她说我总是很幸福。真的吗？我倒觉得不是。也许我与他人比，我的确是很幸福的，我承认。但需多事，他们都不知道...

嗨。希望，有一天我能够有用其面对这件事。

2008-06-20T22:45:00.000-07:00

random sianess.

-survival camp. :) yay better than last yr. hehe. brother bear.... erm. yarh. IRC is fun!! haha. jetty jump!! jumped twice.. wanted thrice budden cannot. campfire... i think quite 冷场... but at least better than last yr. [much much better] then alot of mozzie bites.

happy belated birthday to my bro!! :)

2008-05-17T20:51:00.000-07:00

poink -*

overwhelmed by SIANness

2008-05-11T21:01:00.000-07:00

waha. finally blog.

blah.. i dunno whether i recover alrdy or not. seriously. haihyah. but i dun care alrdy. xP i got a feeling i will nvr recover and i dint bother to count how long i have been liddat liao. :( okaes. nvm about this.. x(

ok.. actually i dunno wad to blog but just feel like blogging.
hmmph. rahh ytd's piano lesson is totally screwed. my teacher start blabbering about me then i started explainin that i am very busy. then she say no exam still busy. then haihyah.. this is not worth to be mentioned.

i seriously dunno wad to blog leh. sian

ok my brain is not working now. finally finish class tee design [back]. the front i dunno wad to put. rahh.

sian nvm.. i am stoning here. i shall stop blogging for now.

pooh

2008-03-23T17:38:00.000-07:00

i shall blog

i already flunked all my test. the coming tests... i also dun see how well can i do.

LA. physics. IH.

so sian. imagine one month without snacks.. i am dying. and yet.. haiyoh. I seek back the days and envied them. I want to recover!! To be able to run [without ending up being coughing and breathless] to be able to breathe? To be able to eat snacks. To be able to think. To be able to shout. To have a clear and not muddled mind. It has been long. I dunno when will this be until but I hope it will END!. END!!! rahh. and never happen. not possible but i hope so. i dun want to suffocate in the corfs any more.

ok.. i have basically been slacking these days. wah. i shouldn't be. i should be studying now. ok. but somethings just dun get into my mind. nvm.

ok.. 2 more days. 2 more days and i can really slack. with all my might and no one will care. good.
ct prelims ytd. it happened so fast. I dun know what to say about it. but i can say we all did our best. (: though its not the best that we can pitch. yupps.

i dunno. there are many things to say in my mind. but i dunno how to phrase. its might not even be proper to say it here. but yarh. i made me feel kind of sad but not exactly sad. its just a negative feeling. i dunno. haih

CAMPCRAFT specialisation TEST!! jiayou sqms. (: we can do it okay?!

I wan to watch some drama serial. but was not allowed. yeap 2 days later i can watch. 2 days... reach soon. i know i flunked everything. but yarh. just let it be over. i hate block test. make me feel stress. everyone studies so much. yet. rahh. still rmb bio ... i corf the whole paper. drank alot of water. in the end make me wan to pee. rahh. hope i dun have any attacks tmr

yeaps. lalalala. i know my blog contents very sian. yarh for now. cos got nothing interesting. nvm. i think if i continue blogging everything will sleep in front of the com. i shall stop today's blog.

2008-03-21T21:30:00.000-07:00

JIAYOU for campcraft prelims tmr!!! (:

NYCT all the way!

[hope it does not rain]

2008-03-21T21:00:00.000-07:00

changed blogskin. x)

2008-03-13T05:35:00.000-07:00

after a long break...

after a internal discussion...

i have decided...

to blog!

hmmph. suddenly realise how long i have not blog. then finally i cannot tahan le. all the thoughts all squeezed at the back of my mind [and the front of my mind]... i decided that i need to 发泄!

ok.. but after so long i also dunno what to start with.

yes i am quite glad that i am not having as much indgoiseitn prob as before. (:

nvm. i should first say that my topics in this post will be drastic.. cos i am just writing what i thinking.

first thing. i start blogging bcos i cannot think. cannot think ... cannot concentrate so i have to crap. i have split everything out of my mind so i can think. but it doesn't make much difference. haih. sian.

nxt week blog test.. can you believe it? aiyoh. i haven started studying. i totally cannot concentrate! i should have say.. its becos of headache. wahlao.

i am not phrasing properly... the person who reads this post probably need to do some puzzle skills. haiyah. its really what i think then i write.

how to do comprehension? dun get the passage. how to do physics? how to do essay? how to think? how to recover? how to study?

lalalala. crap.

OBS (:　
yay!!! so fun. but when i kind of think back.. i dunno what is there to tok about.
there are many funny little things. and many weird happenings. somehow i cannot recall now. how wonderful. oh lets start from first day.. what did i do. crap i cannot think. oh.. erm. ahh. adfadjfdfj... blah blah blah. *stones and think* die. i really cannot think. *崩溃* haih. oh man.. alalalalala. AHHH. WHAT DID I DO? ok forget it.. lets not start from first day.. shall write what i can rmb. FLYING FOX >.< so fun! its very very high.. they say tenzing and shackleton are the only 2 watches who did flying fox. so nice right? and they only do it once in a dunno how many weeks. waha. anw i am in tenzing. tenzing all 306 de (: shackleton also. tenzing and shackleton together is buddy watch. together 306 (: . wah. why i talk liddat.

back to flying fox. its very high.. like 5-6 stories high.. then nid to climb up the long long ladder. haven even climb half way already die. oh. yarh. we learn belaying. belaying is fun. yay. so we belay then the person climb. then flying fox belaying is tiring.. cos ladder too high. then belay until bored. flying fox.. when i jump down. its like i wanted to shout woohoo. but then somehow.. i lost my voice. i carn shout or say anything out. probably to scared. blah. they say i fly until very straight. haha. then reach the down there liao.. i was spinning. as in not my head. literally spinning. xP. many people spin also actually. but the funny thing is ppl fly in many weird posture. hahaha. nvm i shall not mention. rahh. then we go chiong to "camp 3" [no such thing] yarh its by the sea. sandy and all. nid to excrete by the sea. haha. then we pitch tent there. oh our tent is dome shape. so cute. (: lala. then went cooking. oh the food so nice lorh. got oreo,peanut biscuit, tangs, ... its so heavenly. oh yarh our watch eats ALOT. haha. everyone snatch for food. everytime like cook finish some thing.. then next moment nomore left. xP one time.. we cook rice. then we cook the 料. then 料 of course faster. then everyone eat 料 then in the end when the rice is ready all the 料 finish. then..

hiking. was navigator. (: compass and map reading and stuff. forgot a bit. but got a bit can recall. orienteering. xP hmmph. at first mixed up the road with another road. oh .. then we went pass this toilet. everyone went crazy. like "wahh i very long nvr see toilet bowl already!!" then blah... so they got toilet. then blah. then walk... walk. walk. we lead to the right place. then need to find the card. took so long man. i even went into bushes to find. xP. then blah. then only thing i can say is that the bag very heavy. actually mine is considered light as compared to those carrying tents. yups.

then we reach camp1 finally!!! the place is so heavenly. like resort. got flower. got swimming pool! got toilet bowl!! shuang! eat dinner. nice food. its cater food. (: the morning got noodles and hot dog. woohoo. then it rain. kayak supposingly.

then we go back camp 2. [oh we started from camp 2] then rain stop. we kayak! tenzing with shackleton. (: then its odd number. then yups. oh then need one person who kayak b4 to single kayak. then no choice. then i kayak single kayak. i was super nervous at first. then yup.. then blah. SINGLE KAYAK is so FUN!!! wee. learn capsize. yay .capsize is fun de lorh. but in the middle of the sea. one person capsize abit scary. but now to think of it, its super fun.. i wanted to capsize again budden yarh.. aiyah. then oh i not navigator liao. (: they say need cx leader. names are shouted. damn nervous tt time. gave the excuse of single kayak.. xP weepii. then there's this very shallow part of the sea. its in the middle of the sea!!! then its so scary lorh.. like in the middle of the sea. then its so shallow. so weird. oh then alot of my classmate wanted to pee. so they got out of their kayak and start peeing. so amusing larh. then my instructor was down there " DUN get out of the kayak!!!"

hah. then the irritating part. blah. we got back to shore. then we move everything up .the we got 1 hour to bathe and pack and move everything. so everyone went off. then the stuff are at the boat shed there. i walk back to the store and then to the shed like more than 10 times i think. spend the whole 1 hour moving things here and there. grrr. then dint bathe. then they go eat. then instructor let us bathe (: thats the good thing. tt day we got vege to cook... the cook cook . we got soup . so nice larh. though most of it is the chicken stalk thing. xP.

haihyoh. i crapped allot le. shall stop toking about OBS.

feeling rather irritated now. cos i realised i spent more than 1 day blogging. actually is i continue frm ytd. wahh.

i shall 发泄 other things now.

the chinese words part can just dun see. its really all my blabber.

虚弱。为什么我就是如此那么虚弱？原本，不管日晒雨淋，我都不会生病。但为什么？为什么会无缘无故生病？已经两个星期了。我快崩溃了。本来发烧。然后，不知什么，没烧了，伤风，咳嗽。我真的要疯了。然后淋了一阵雨，又开始发烧。然后，…… 这是我吗？我是那么脆弱的吗？不！我对我自己说不。但为什么还么好？前天，又淋了雨。又发烧。为什么！两个礼拜了！气死人。时不时就头痛。有没有搞错。什么都做不好。也许，我就是那么弱。不！我要好起来。rahh!! irritated. weakling!! rahh!! drgf. nvm. i am just blabbering. 我决定了。我要活得坚强。不能被病魔打败！加油！hope it won't go on..

blah blah.. okae carn hw haven finish. how to do. rah.
crap.

i am tired.
tired of everything. [i realise i need to sleep very often these days] [ i just slept in the afternoon after piano lesson] [ now i feel really sleepy. that happens ytd too. xP ]
tired. tired of homework. tired of test. tired of headaches. tired of coughs. tired of flu. tired. very tired. can i just sleep. and slack. sleep and slack. yeap..

blah.

sounds emo. NO! i am not emo. but just blabbering. ok nvm. i shall just go to sleep. carn stand it anymore. rahh.

-- 9.33pm,thursday [!! crap] ,13.03.08

2008-01-18T05:34:00.000-08:00

Ok... i guessed its better. not so frequent.. so the moral is not to eat so much...

rahh i ate alot just now. sian diao.. now quite mild.

oh. rahh... feeling very grrahhh... though i think there is not much things to do but i feel that there's a lot.. grrr... i dun noe.. feeling weird now.. im not happy.. im not say sad.. not say irritated.. not say angry... but i feel more to the negative one.. i dunno what i feeling.

I WAN LEARN GUITAR!!! woots.. but i dunno whether i can cope.

now i got ct, GAP, piano... but still I WAN LEARN GUITAR!!>.<
Guitar so cool!! xD woots.. nvm i also dunno whether can. shall go ask.

waha.. can see that my blog is not so frequently seen by people. cos no one tags. :O

carn think properly now. dunno what i writing oso. haha.
lalalala... [thats alliteration]xD

i need to study like siao!!! esp IH... i think i will fail. dun understand. humanities.. rahh .. dun like.

i shall go do time plan for tmr.. (:

i always dunno how to end lehh.. cos everytime sound so sudden. haih i shall say " i am ending here.. "

i am ending here..

-18 January, 9.46pm

2007-12-31T19:12:00.000-08:00

haih.

what is happening?

dgoiseitn ... it is a simple process that everyone thinks it would be.

its natural, to everyone or almost. I don't know about that. It may be easy but to me it seemed that it isn't so easy anymore.

people may not know what i am talking about. cause i would not wish that they know. mndop also doesn't know... so yeah. What is happening? What will happen? What to do? I really don't know and don't want to know.

since no one understand, then treat the whole lot above as crap.. just ventilating my thoughts. stuck. haih.

oh well. i should say happy new year!! today is the first day of 2008. (: a new start, i hope.

oh well, didn't count down yesterday. my bro went. stayed at home sianly and watched this korean drama. very laggy. almost fell asleep.

hmmph.. feeling touyun now. realise how weird it looks. rahhh. cannot think properly. i feel like sleeping. lalalalala... but i cannot. gotta finish my zuowen. xD actually i finished, just need to copy onto gaozhi. yeap. so sian. later need to go cuz house.. eat again? rahh.

indgoiseitning now, so its rather oww. hopeless me. carn do anything can i? hope tonite nothing bad happens. geez.

oh well. according to some practitioner... LBP at 20s. ahh. hope that's not true. blah. so weird.

great! feeling better now. i shall get back to work..

1/1/2008 11.40am

2007-12-28T06:02:00.000-08:00

i am here to blog again (:

wad to say... today got dalt. and yarh it didn't go too well for me..

hmmph. then got riffle practice thing. cannot go. cos got eye appoinment.
waited 2 hours just to meet the doc. rahh. [and nah its not bcos of the scratch]

my brain stopped thinking. i dunno wad to say. nvm. i shall blog another day.

dajia must jiayou, keep our spirits high.

how to end...grrr...

end? end. okay this is the end of this post.

28 dec 1010pm

2007-12-07T05:03:00.000-08:00

hmmph.. i decided to blog. ehh... the blog is dead. yup, its dead. blah. but its in coma now. err..may be dead again or revive. i dunno. depends.

haiya. the last post...hehe. apparently it wasn't really true. sorry lorh. it just fell dead after eating the kai1 wei4 cai4.. cos of food poisoning. erhh... yarh.

blah. and the tagboard. i lazy to put.

haih.. i carn really type properly now. grr.

going overseas next week. why everytime like tt. last year also. the timing is just not right. haih. WHY! nvm i shall accept my fate. oh well. but... i still dun feel... grahh! somemore this time is only 5 days! FIVE short days, i thought i have hope but... nvm.

sunday wu3 longing.... sequence... always made my mind stop working.

argh keep typing wrongly.

now i typing with this paper thing on my finger. aiyah. cos.... grrah...nvm. actually my mndop dunno. later they dun let me practice how. aiyah. haiyah. kae i somehow lost the blogging thing. as in i dunno how to blog. though i m blogging now. blah dunno how to say. i am so contradicting.

anw, jiayou!!! (:

wow i currently took 25 minutes to type the above. so interesting. sian.

grr..i am staring blankly at the screen. nvm. i shall stop this post liao. i doubt many will see it. cos hah so long nvr post... probably everyone given up in it liao.

kaes.. signing off.. [hope it don die]

7 december 9.21pm [i decided to write cos the time not accurate and very sian to keep changing]

2007-10-08T07:35:00.000-07:00

this post is just a 开胃菜 after its hibernating.. just to let it wake up abit.
when its 清醒 then it will be alive and full of LIFE!! woots :D

bleah

2007-08-12T05:36:00.000-07:00

Sunday, 12 August 07

hoho. merry christmas.. geeh. too early. i should say a very belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!! <33 haha. o nvm. =) glad that tmr is a holiday. if not i will die. cos there's many things that i haven completed. xP i am dead tired today. and is still garh. carn concentrate on my work. almost forgot about the speech and compre. and of cos my late works. die.

o i decided that i shld write the date down or shld i not. nvm. depends if i rmb.>> when i blog. keep typing wrongly ):

nvm. i dunno wad to blog. o HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANYANG too. =) though haven reach..

okaes.. ytd 90th anniversary... can say that its successful.=D glad that my mum carn see me. -.- haha. though i did one thing wrong and another diu lian thing. but finally its over!! no more missing acts, dalts, important events.. yay
realised that we need to reach school at 9 at only 9.23. so yarh. i left my house at 9.15 anw so i reached at about 9.40 then no sqms reach yet. so sian. haha. or isit 9.30 something. nvm. who cares. we dint really do anything related to us so dun really need to come so early.

we left at 10.30 in bus3. heh. the bus with props. and little people. reached raffles convectional centre at dunno wad time. o we got plenty of bread and one bottle of water. no lunch.. so thats our lunch. and then dinner at 4. heh. settled down in the holding room which is very big. got 3 somemore. but only one room is for musical. so sad. aiyah still got nyps and nyk and choir and guzheng and band all those so shldn't be so sad larh. its okae lard... at least bigger than the other rehearsal.

later on dint really do anything. played bridge. so funny. okae got one round.. melia put her card already. then sqms say kuai4 dian3 fang4 leh! then melia tot its her so she put another card. so funny. nvm. like that say not funny one. then went for supposingly full runthrough then they say no time. then slack slack slack. forgot wad we do larh.

o the place so damn big larh. so cool. okaes. nvm. then suddenly say i need to take flag in. yea bleah. nvm. dint wear my blue specs on stage. [nvr wear any larh] so when my turn go up on stage, i carn see the ppl properly i dun see faces. so i dun go and recognised. but yarh i noe i very out of position. bleah.

b4 that we went eating at burger king again. this time round i ate chicken one. [last time i ate fish] gulp down all the food. and rushed up to wear full u.

o b4 eating we put make up. how disgusting. my lips so PINK. look so eeeks. blusher is okae actually. but it look alot in the toilet. shldn't have put lipsticks b4 eating.

so after wearing full u. btw sqms all squeezed into the handicap toilet. not squeez larh. its very spacious. so BIG . can put about8-9 ppl changin inside.

after tt. we realise melia got NO eyebrows. so we went to seek help frm the person. then the person draw like chinese opera. -.- so we draw our self. me and jiayuin look like LA BI XIAO XIN.. so.. bleahss.mind that.

[watched jump in!! so cool. i wanna watch finish music and lyrics!! who got the disc.. i wan. nvm thats a random thought.]

so end of the whole thing. went to look for my mum. went all the way down to first floor cos she say sth like meet at da4 men2. so yarh there i am .. trying to call her for more than 10 times. getting very despo. though i noe she's is somewhere in the hotel. but when you call someone and yet the person dun pick for more than 10 times... you will really get irritated and despo. so finally she answer and said she is still at the table. -.- so i went up again. then reach the room. so big. so many ppl still at their tables. how am i suppose to find her. so i started calling again. at first i tot at the first call she would answer. in the end i called more than 10 times again. then she still dint pick then i saw my p6 form teacher. so i walk towards tt direction cos it shld be somewhere there. intending to ask him then i saw my mum. she was then taking out her phone.-.- haish.

so i am with her liao. so see many primary school teachers toking to mum not alot larh. some is toking to another teacher beside my mum. i just said lao shi. or nod my head. cos i forgot alot of names already..!! -.- carn really tok in relax tone cos yarh.. all teachers ehh. nvm then they tok here tok there. then wang lao shi told me to pose at the figurines of those nanyang ppl, the head got cut out one, the one that you stuff your head there. then i say bu yong jin. then she insisted so cannot say: zhen de bu yong! cai bu yao pai la! kaes so i took. -.- so many ppl looking. i tot i saw mr tan walk by. dunno whether he saw. but guan zhe me duo. so yea. hmmph. then went home in a car of a teacher's exstudent's parent's car. ok. sound chim. nvm. kind of already used to sitting with teachers in cars.

got down at KAP. waited for dad's car . reach home. bathe. fall dead on the bed.

then its today already. so fast. i rmb i got this really stupid dream but i forgot le.

sian diao. today. ate till 9.30. then i got sucked into a storybook until 1030 when i realised the time then slept till 1130 still very tired. then got tuition until 1330.then went up falls on bed. dint do much things cos soon going to eat. eat until 2+ then got sucked into the story until 3. then went up. wanting to do some proper hw. in the end... wad did i do. okaes i did abit. but my abit is less than abit. so its only afew lines. then went to watch jump in. then went to bathe.enjoyed my bathe. so shuang. then intending to do hw oso. then in the end went to do eye thing. by then its 6. soi went to on the com. and check stuff. then went back to the room. then my bro returns frm swimming. then they bought ice scream. then my bro on bleach which attracted me down. the its time to go eat dinner outside. eat eat eat. ate food duh. then went home abt 7+ goin to be 8. played some random piano. those random music. anyhow play those type.

then went up at 8.15 then thinking there's alot of hw. then i turn out bloggin. [wad i am doing now] xp

shall go off. dig for my late works.

bleah

2007-08-04T22:32:00.000-07:00

hey hey.. seems like my blog recovered =D yay. but i dunno whether i got repeated post as i carn see my post in the blog. hehe.nvm. just glad that it recovered!! woots.

almost died just now. -_- tuition lorh. need to read out the passage then the more i read the more ich my throat gots. so i started to burst out into coughs.. so stupid. bleah. then you know when you try to not cough, when you are going to cough, your face will turn red and lookin as if you want to shit or you are trying not to laugh or sth. then my tuition teacher ask want to go toilet or not. then i shook my head.-__- okaes this dumb. nvm

hope it doesn't rain. cos if not i am incharge of closing all the windows, doors, the clothe thing... aiyah then i shld be sleepin then.. somemore i am a deep sleeper.

suddenly realised why the volume so soft. cos the headphone is plucked.. -.-nvm. still feeling in no mood to study. suppose tmr is physics test budden got the 90th anniversary musical rehearsal at the raffles there... for whole day.

waah. took a bunch of photos. =)

pooh noes how to play PIANO!!

photos in photo xD --- my family dunno when-__-

BABY POOH FAMILY!! [last yr bdae prets=)]

squadtee design!!! woots [sqms, if u by anychance read my blog =)ps: go print aft cross country okae?]

ROCKY in sleepy mode[zzzz]

very tired.. shall go sleep a while. shall wake at 3.30. now its 2pm

argh. i dun wan cross country. i dreaded it. bleah. why me.

[pooh]]-*

garhs... jiayou everyone in anything that you wan to jiayou :]

2007-08-03T00:41:00.000-07:00

woah. just randomly trying whether can blog already.. .then you noe what?

CAN!!! woots. *pops champagne*

okaes.. feeling rather sian and got this sad feeling. though i dunno why.. maybe its a foreboding feeling about sth bad is going to happen.. blaah. hope not.

seriously in no condition to run cross-country. All that i can say is that i would die. being sabo-ed. life's really tragic. I really dun wan to run. how many times must i say? how can register me into competitive without my consent? now what trouble i have gotten into. so unreasonable. i would like to emphasize that i DONOT want to run. why must it be like that? there's so many faster runners than me dun chose them chose me for what? I run so slow, think can win meh?

guess that its fated. [for me to run?] blahs. i den dun wan! haish.

maybe i shall just copy what i posted on the other blog here..:

okays, since its transfered here, and this blog is suppose to be dead/not alive/abandoned,so i can speak english instead ha!

hmmph, this blog is supposingly my chinese blog. hehe. but yarh seldom blog so here.

as in my blog [the pooh one] i said i would cont. but i wrote some out in the draft but haven finsih.
so apparently now i forget what i want to sae.

argh. i am tired of going to the toilet already....
well, i shall blog about this week.

basically, this is a bad week. Started off bad. An exam week somemore. almost failed chinese. sobs.
lets see, monday is maths test. yea.. thats how the week is started. the paper is okay actually. budden, surely would be filled of careless mistakes.dun even noe i finish doing. cos i dunno, skip,dunno skip . haish. saddening. when doing, my pen almost fly out. and the worst thing in a maths test is [lets guess...]

out of correction tape. feel so despo tt time. tembling was my hands, ticking was the clock, then time's up. what a wonderful start for the week. [i rather it be day]

o b4 tt is it. haven pass up video. managed to chiong finish. but i carn open the file. dun care. thats one of the reason of my bad starting. but it isn't the worst of all.

then sometime of the day got language arts. our class suppose to start presenting rNj budden apparently no one could make it. so ms teo asked for 2 group who can volunteer to present tmr. no one raised up. saddening. this cannot carry on. so my group and another group volunteered. so we came to the conclusion:we need to chiong.

so well, i forgot for wad reason did we stay back... anw stayed till 4 sth. then go home. started piaing romeo and juliet. not immediately after i reach home though. reach home like goin 5... bathe, settle down, then 5.30. then i realise i need to buy hair net and figure of 8s for the act on tuesday. so i called my mum. to realise she reach home and is downstairs. so wonderful. felt despo. asking whether can bring me out to buy. in the end got scolded. bleah.

tts the worst too. cos my dad came and said wanna go beauty world cos apparently heard wad i said. and also becos my bro wan to collect harry potter book. so i went along, thinking that okaes lucky its half u but in the end full u xP. o then yarh then go to the corrano shop and buy. bought figO8. spent lots of time looking for hairnet. [i am suppose to help chuxi buy too] then wasted lots of time there. cos theres no hairnet.then went to look for dad.

go home like going 7 le.

then say go eat dinner. at 7plus when i was just abt to on the com. actually i on-ed it. so i have to off it again .

went down, feeling dead tired [dunno why have been feeling like that for long]
then eat eat eat. then was abt to go up chiong. got called down to eat fruits. then go down again. eat 1 not enuf, mus 3... so i was munching desperately. but the slower my teeth work. anw... so i go up. then on the com...

so apparently going to be 8 le. thinking i already half dead now. so on the com , loading slower than usual. then the irritating fan keep blowing my stuff off. blahhs.

so chiong arh, pia arh ... slowly its already 1++. haven finish yet. [my grp consist of jung, chuxi, cheryl] dunno wad time they went off. guess almost as late as me. but that time i was just abt to ask them sth, they were offline. so i continued piaing wadeva. then i finished at 2.

later. went my room, feeling dead. VERY dead. took out my boots, started polishing. no liang. very irritated. argh. polish badges... went iron u.. blah. my eyelids were so heavy. cannot concentrate. haish. haish. haish. shld have make my u a priority. haish. saddening. nvm will noe why later.

so very tired.put boots in, trying to find non sagging socks, then put every thign nicely. then boots, i put my shoelace into the shoe, then went brush teeth. came out sleepily. then put my boots into shoebag. then put my bag outside. [tts what my family does] not outside the house larh. outside the room.

sleep... [probably the best parts]

nxt day. script for presentation i printed one copy. then went to look whether any photocopying machines available with chuxi. apparently not. then bell ring. [not bell larh.. the music] so i think its raining or the floor is wet or sth like that, we went back classroom. blah blah. then lang arts. realise one teamate nvr come. then we chiong like siao for presentation. almost cried. but nvr =D. but well haish. carn help but just say the THIS WEEK SUCK!!!!!ARGH!!!! bleah. sorry.

afternoon got act. then cos of breifing at hall, then dismissed quite late. started running to toilet. then well sqms started falling down. started with jung in front of me. then lucky i shan3 de2 kuai4 if not another bad thing will happen this week. then chuxi who is behind me fell on her butt cos her shoe no friction. -.-

so anw. yarh went to change to full u. started with sock stuffing. then black sock. then boots. thats when the most terrifying thing happen. I CARN FIND MY SHOELACES! *curse and swears* i really did put in. i guess when i put it into the shoebag it drop off. or am i hallucinating that nite cos i am damn tired. then got so despo. started throwing myjacket here and there, my school shoes. dig into my school shoes, shoe bags, U, bag, NO SIGHT OF IT!! ARGH!!! started crying.

if not for ytd's chionging for presentation, i could have prepared my U more properly. and after chionging, the thing is we DID NOT present tt day. @#$%^&*!!!! sobs...feeling sad thinking of it. haish. HAISH!!!!! feel sorry for sqms for extending time. haish. why must this happen? what is this? why??!!! argh.so in the end wear back school u.

fell in my eyes red. [i guess, dunno, hope not] didn't say timing. hurhhs.. cos got sorethroat. n partially no mind to say. ma'am ask me why i am in school uniform, i said i din bring shoelace. and i almost cried out. kaes.. actually i did but not severe, the tears is in my eyes but i calmed down after standing there for long time.

!@#$%&*() i really feel very ARGH!!!! why must everything happen to me. last time the toilet ate my berret. now what! seriously lorh last time. its impossible for a toilet to gulp down my berret. what just happen to it.? tt time i help jiayuin tie hairnet [just as i am about to put berret] then yarh when i got back to it, it disappeared!! i got sqms to show evidence that i brought!! *curse swear* haish.. nvm sharn tok abt the pass. but tts what im doing now.

[shall blog abt wed,thur,fri next time]

feeling kind pissed of writing these stuff.
(there's a bug on my shirt now bleah)

[pooh]]-*

~is life just like that? or is it like this?~

yarhs...so shall continue my post though i feeling pissed writing. what happen on wednesday...oh man that day. morning got australian maths competition thing. then while we doing.. mr tan wrote on the board that tmr is IL presentation. thats a shocking news. where got so sudden? wahh.. we are definitely going to die. sheesh. thats not the main point but its kind of the main point. that is so tragic. geesh. then so at night, we chionged the presentation.

discussed on msn on the presentation. then i went to find info. then ... i dunno what happen!! and you know what? this is not the first time. [i just knew abt that on a monday..after this stupid week] what is happening to me. jung was saying that i was possesed. T___T bleah. but seriously what happened? i slept? no couldn't be. doin things unconsciously? fainted? what happened? there's too many things that are unexplainable. i dun understand. i dun wan to understand.

this incident really irritates me. sqms say that shiyun ma'am called me before the day of bowling prize presentation to tell me abt the prize presentation. they said i nvr say ma'am at all in the call?! waah. the first time i heard it i was like cos i nvr hear my name. so i was like which sqm would do such a thing. then i heard melia said we noe pooh wun do such a thing. so damn confused. they say i only say arh... orh.. okae.. without sayin a single ma'am.. waah. broke down upon hearing. nvr knew i would do such a thing. i dun even noe i did such a thing. i dun even know she called me. i dun even know what happened? what happened???!!! the next day.. just like every other day, i went down to flag raising/morning assembly and was just abt to sit cos friday got long announcement. then see jiawen ma'am running towards me.. i tot she was just goin by so i didn't care.then she appeared to be toking to me. saying that bowling competition. at first i dint noe what happen. then she started goin off or sth like that or did she repeat. dunno. then i followed her. then yarh.. i just tot that why i dunno abt it. then tot its nothing unusual. but nvr knew that there's such a shameful thing behind!! i'm really angry with myself.

when i heard of it, i tot it might be fake. well. haish.

thursday, apparently, a bad day. maths presentation. totally flunked it. saddening. i tot i could be good and work had for this term. in the end. you know... maths. feeling sad that day. o after that got act or sth... what isit arh?

nvm so after feeling kind of depressed when running to change into half-U isit half-U... then blah.. o i noe its POP rehearsal.

o then what happened...

hmmph bleah. friday, wad happened.. o having this really weird headache. kind of mild yet unmild yet irritating yet wun die kind... whatever. i dunno how to describe. then i rmb PE i almost died. then .. wad happened.then follow on is chinese. what happen in chinese. forgot le. nvm. then aiyah.. when i rmb what happen on friday then i blog abt it larh.

during the weekends.. the soarthroat transformed into flu. haish. i know i sound weird... (sometimes) unknowingly. yea. so blah . a bad week in deed.

later got piano lesson. sian diao. as usual hehe. yet to practice alot. going to die. piano reminds me of theory which reminds me that my theory is shi bai de.

bleah. i dun wan piano lessons. dreaded them. though sometimes the teacher very nice, sometimes, very fierce.. dunno what to expect later.surely scold one. cos nvr practice.

gaaz... getting restless should study science but my mood now isn't suitable for studyin. maybe after piano lesson would be better. having this drown feeling. like water enter your nose type. having the weird headache. spend lots of time bloggin. started at 2+ now already 3.37pm. typing at a slow speed. haha.

garg. i want to go DABA!!! but that stupid piano lesson.. 415 to 515... why carn it be earlier. guess its destinated again? hah. thinking of destinated. i want to be flag bearer. but then got the dance thing. destinated again i guess.. haish. nvm.. shan tok abt all this stuff. 机会真的比努力更重要。you see i got no chance so how can i 努力to be a good flag bearer? though i learnt some le. yay=)

i shall go prac piano. o.o i spent 3 minutes typing all that paragraph. -_-now its 3.40pm.. 40!! a nice number. nvm

[pooh]]-*

ps: melia!! tell your hand to get well soon okae? =)

2007-07-08T16:44:00.000-07:00

[yay... continued post]

bleahs.. but den the teacher come in leh.

nvm i shall go off and continue l8r BOOs.

jiayou for my dae. T__T esp kou tou bao gao. haha

[to be continued2]

2007-07-08T15:57:00.000-07:00

YAY!!!! FINALLY BLOGGING!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

err.. in school now =0

[chu: HAHAHA. pooh is lame-.- she is like WEEEEing at blogger-.- aiyorh. cannot blame her she cannot blog at home. SOBS! ]

[jung:wahaha. pooh is diao!! xD i got sorethroat! T_T]

errr... this is like combined post le-__-

okae nvm.. o i dreamed of this dream that i got car ACCIDENT!! T___T
so sad. lorh. i was dunno why running across the road. then i was bang by this red car. then i was lying on the ground. I CAN FEEL THE PAIN!!!! wah piang leh. i feel so real.T___T its like so pain. then i see a blurred face n then i close my eyes then open to see in hospital.. =.=

okaes. nvm. i got another dream. chao stupid one. its like all my cousin got a racing car. then they still like my age. i was like wahh, then dunno why i started racing car too. then dunno larh. then got some xin chuan mei yi ren there, judging us. then they got the dunno what kan wai biao see who win. then they go chose my cousin leh!!! i feel so sad. kaes thats not the point. then we started racing. then race race race. then horh. i tied with my cousin. i was so surprised T___T o but then he win cos he got the racing car look. that was like???!@

ahhh got to go down le.=D sit down with sqms!! yay i miss them-__-

[to be continued]

2007-05-01T04:10:00.001-07:00

days have past. and yet a post to come. so here it is!! wahaa.

i long time no blog liao. cos i long time no go online, use com, xD.

today just made finish the baby! waha. x) yay! hmmph. past few days, many events happened. quite happy but sometimes feeling very stressed and emo.

last friday is npdp!! YAY!! feeling so excited that day! wore full u the whole day! but got PE, then nid to change in to PE attire. *sobs* haish nvm haha. hmmph. but so happy that got promoted the day b4! now my bro wun call me a PRIVATE anymore. he keep laughin at me n say i oni private. T___T then can wear swimming badge and got 2 more badges!! -- safety first and third class drill badge!! woots! yay! i love it when the badges cling. T__T

den is DALT DINNER! yay! i looked forward for it very much lorh. our theme very diao . frm ramdom. then we thought that should compromise the colour we wearing. then we were thinking that not all sqms have the same colour. then we thought of any colour larh. which eventually leads to rainbow colour!! HEHE!

den ytd just have csm. dun really noe wad happen. cos doing marshall duty. wear gloves!! but apparently, its too big for me. harhs. den actually goin for om meeting. but then tried to call them to see wear they are. then phone batt flat. cannot contact. T__T so in the end went out with sqms.

ate lunch at beauty world mac donalds. cos thought that KAP would be very crowded. den we all feeling sian then tok at mac for some time. then walk around beauty world which is very sian. esp for me cos i walk there for 14 years liao. haish. then later decided to go west mall. bought a fitting glove, polishing gloves, some materials. then i gone bankrupt. saddening. o.o we went to eat ice kachang. and we all dun lyk corn so we gif all to hong.. xD hehe. we just went window shopping. cos we all no money. T__T then went library. at least i accomplished something there. YAY! we were being ordered to be silent for abt 2 times. and told to take our bags down frm the window for once. T__T haish. waaha. then i saw alot of things i wan to buy but is bankrupt.

den today. is a sian day. decided to do things tt are fun. art stuff. and a baby! -__-. but as u see, i turn out blogging. haish

still got jian bao, yi lun wen, ODIOUS ode, science ws, science SIA. haish. feeling sian and dun feel lyk doing. how. die larh. but i look forward to watch movie tmr. yay!

i was just xia dao by this bird. suddenly fly to my window and chirp. almost fell down the chair.

wad am i doing now. gaaaz. i dun feel like doing hw. haish. this fri is dalt i think. AND I LOOK FORWARD TO IT!! YAY!!!!! last time got dalt then i was like so looking forward. then suddenly they inform us that there is this support badminton thingy. then all my hopes for dalt and disappeared. AND NOW hope there's nothing poping up on the dalt day.

its 7 now. and i am not doing anything useful. ARGH! sheesh. this sucks man. wah sian diao lorh. to think there is so many things to do. i dunno where to start with. can the world just be art and music and fun stuff? waah. haish

nvm. i think i shld get going.

ps: dun bother abt my last post. just being emo.

PPS: forgot to say HAPPY LABOUR DAY TO ALL! ( ALSO CALLED MAYDAY!)

2007-04-11T21:01:00.000-07:00

The empty friendship

-this is not a poem but just a couple of thoughts being compiled together-

******

Ever have a feeling of loneliness?

Ever HAVE a feeling of abandon?

Of course you haven. BUT...

how would you have known my hurt feelings the bottom of my heart?

Though it has been long, yet inside me, its holds the word forever.

The time i feel the loneliness is never ending ever since the time you parted me.

For what reason? For what good reason must you cheat on me.

Ever thought of getting cheated by one you trust.
Ever felt the hurt in your heart? One that taunts u forever and ever?

Do you ever know that ever since the day you step into my heart, my world...

I have always thought of you as one whom i could trust and rely on.

BUT however, like all stories, you betrayed my trust, you let me see ur true self.

For what i have been in the happy moments with you,

Just melted and stained my memory which could not be withdrawn.

The day you walked out of my heart.

The day you cheated me.

The day you betrayed me.

THE DAY that the world seemed to hate me, detest me.

THE DAY... just the day that you gave me a letter.

Proclaiming the end of our relationship.

Its hard to believe. And also hard to understand.

The reason behind the way of actions you chosed.

But I know that on that day. when you give me the letter...

I know that I will lose you forever.

I know deep in my heart... that,

you DITCHED me.

Do you know that the day you left me,

the day you claimed the end of everything,

is the day that i suffer day and night.

Do you know that i cried silently,

fearing that you might know?

Do you know that i cried day and night just because of you?

Do you know what is it that you have caused when you left me?

DO you? Or do you not.

I remember the time. you enter my lonely heart, filled my heart with rays of the sun.

you are the one who chased away the storm, the wind.

You are the one who changed my life to a better one. Yes you are the one.

You are the one who always stood by my side, help me. AND YET...

You are also the one who hurt me the most,

YOu are the one who betrayed my complete trust in you.

YOU are just the one, leaving me behind, with no one, no soul to be with me.

you probably do not know how empty I feel that time.

I see you happy together with your new friends.

Making me jealous and yet is unable to do anything.

I still remember the day we started planning about our future.

We thought that maybe our house will be as big as a mansion.

With carparks, swimming pools, gardens, playground...

we even thought of working together next time.

But what have come out at the end of it?

Nothing but a pertatic little friendship.

Ever since the day u left me.

I have no one with me.

How would you have feel to be someone, sitting down there,

feeling sad because you lost someone you trust and yet no one comes and comfort you.

How would you have feel and understand what i have gone through?

Whether you see this or not.

i hope this empty friendship will perish among my thoughts.

i hope..

I would never ever thought about it again.

yes. i hope.

******

let me forget this. once and for all!

2007-04-09T04:21:00.000-07:00

blab blab.. blabs.
i feel sian.
sian sian sian .
i feel sick
sick sick sick.
i want to sleep
zzz zzz zzz.
what i toking?
dunno leh
why isit so
the peotic
i oso dunno

ARGH. i what am i writing!! nvm.. this post is just a anyhow post. ignore it.

2007-03-29T05:59:00.000-07:00

came here to blog for a while. feeling chao sian now and dun feel like doing anythin. shall blog about the past few days. alot of things happened in this week. haish.

26 March 2007 (Monday)
Feeling chao stress for i haven do finish the home economics report, and is chionging some geography presentation thing. then got maths ws 3.1 . but luckily dunnid to prepare u. if not i die. o then still need to study for tkam. i hate it! i almost went out of mind trying to study it. you know what, actually i haven ____ reading it. T__T but apparently, the text is too chim for me and i carn absorb anything thing. therefore i came to a conclusion that i will fail the essay *sobs*. haha should be positive. but still i dun really have any confidence abt it. i almost died cos i am staring blankly at the first page and then nth was goin into my mind...

27 March 2007 (Tuesday)
feeling chao sian diao today. today is the most things happen one. (sounds weird the sentence but nvm) today. piad home economics presentation. feeling chao stress lorh. i haven finish revising my tkam or rather i haven even started. went straight to school then start doing presentation. do do do. nvr eat recess. then got LA which means TKAM test!! ARGH! i crapped everything. i dun even know what are there to write. i put in the mixture of all the themes and i am going to die larh. then after tt is home econs!! FEELING SO ARGH! haven finish doing presentation somemore. i feel so shi1 bai4 as the leader. ARGH. but it already happen. the presentation missed out alot of things. i think we are going to fail for this. lunch, we were doing geog presentation. then dint eat also. though asked jung to help us buy. ate after school. then have act. yea thats the worst part. its abt 2.55pm. time to fall in. well as usual running to np room. den how would i expect myself to fall at the stairs!! so pain lorh. limp to np room. i tot the pain will subside when i reach np room. i tot its just temporary. i tot the most i would get a cut or sth. yea i tot. well its no use assuming things. things were worst than i expected. doing the pt "gong jian bu", i realise whenever i bend my leg, i will have this pain. nvr had it b4. then the worser thing is the "go down on your left" waah siao liao. i wasn't even doing it properly. i wasn't even reaching for my right leg. u carn imagine wad i was doing lorh. using my hand to withstand my weight. den finally after the wad seem to be long time, change to go down on ur right. hate it! hate it!! T__T i fell down when trying to get up. -.- hmmph then run. well. tried running. i tot i could i tot its just temporary. but things are always unexpected. in the end. the campcraft later i cannot do pegging!! i wan to peg!! BOO! -.- nvm. i will have lots of chance... but i want to master the way of pegging in the not the kiaping way. and its so ironic. just so ironic. i was thinking to myself.(abt last week) i shall not break my record of not falling out at all despite all circumstances in these 4 years in np. and den you see what happen lah. i fell out. SO IRONIC!! WAH! nvm. i shall continue this record after this week.after this week i would not fall out at all! yay!

28 March 2007 (Wednesday)
nth much happen today. xcept for prize giving ceremony. well got this wad top in ICT thingo. dint even noe there's such a prize until camelia tell me. and i really dint expect me to get the prize. you see, my ICT skills are just so lousy. being top in dat is the least i could think of. o the main point isn't me getting the prize. i was chao sian diao there.. then i went practicing knots... u see knots and lashings test is on friday! and i am going to die. cos i will be damn nervous. then i will shou mang jiao luan then i will die! so yarh after getting my prize which was a mere certificate and some gift voucher, i went to search for camelia and we went practicing knots together. i keep mixing up the marlin spike and the wad.. mac harness (dunno how to spell). then___ came along. then blablabla... *series of conversation happens* then me and camelia was like diao when __ went of. so after that we began to read our own story book and blaahs. nth much happen. o sth stupid happen when i reach home.. kaes i went home, feeling chao lei and sort of feverish.went shower then lay dead on the bed. woke up at night. then i was like huh? wad time liao arh. isit 5am? today wad day arh? got act or not arh? full u prepare liao mah arh? then i was like thinking. isit time for school? then feeling sort of its time for school. then i went to brush my teeth (about to brush that time) then, my bro shouted come down and eat dinner. den i was like harh? dinner? morning got dinner? or isit still at nite? den i look at the clock to realise it was abt 8. i was err.. okay lorh then went to eat dinner. so diao rite. i feel so dumb. maybe i shen zhi bu qing liao. haha but who cares. that nite dint really do anything. went to sleep early cos feeling very very very tired though i slept for very long.

29 March 2007 (Thursday - today)
not much happen also. stayed back to practice knots and lashing. i got a feeling i going to do badly but i must have confidence in myself. YEA! but den i carn change my mood leh. had a hard time practicing knots with my leg sticking out like what the.-.- i want to sit properly in the comfortable way i always sit but then cannot larh! how i wish i could recover by tmr so i can be pegger!! went home at abt 6 in 174 with melia and cong. then change bus to 173 then i saw my exprimary school mate now in dunno primary wad. but still he is very small and naughty. dint say hi to him. just recognise him. not very close to him mah. guess he primary3 oni. reach home then slept again. i dun even noe when i slept but i just slept. then i woke up and luckily this time i dint think that its mornin. went to eat. then there's this call that called for me and my bro picked up and then i dint gave me lorh. eat also can give one wad. but nvm... and until now nobody called me. so guess its not important?

yea yea. things happen too fast. and i haven do the activity worksheet and jian bao. i am dead. still need to practice knots. with timing and everything. ARGH. i just wasted plenty of time here i realise. thats why i dun wan to blog. should go now. bb

2007-03-14T17:02:00.000-07:00

waah i too sian diao liao. I carn believe i am brain washed.. i forget everything i learn.. even the 3 equations..tt i used to rmb clearly.. wahh seh. *sobs* o i am still stuck at question2 of maths ws 2.2. carn continue on liao. isit bcos of ytd? isit? isit.. wah. i knew sth bad would happen ytd.. sobs. haish. its not my fault. i got a super duper scary nightmare.. u noe even in the nightmare, i was so scared tt i ran to this temple and pray like siao. i was like where's mama papa in the temple.. i hope i was home when i dunno where's my home. its so dark at nite. then in the morning i woke up pale as ever. i haven had nightmares for a very long time. then monday nite suddenly got.. then i knew sth bad would happen ytd.. =( waah. then ytd morning i was praying to budda. waah. i nvr got so frighten b4. usually i was very unaffected by all these scary stuff. i not scared of creepy crawlies... animals.. almost everything. but ytd when i wake up, i almost got a shock of my life at everything. i decided that i hope tt day could be a good day. why mus such a horrible nightmare occur to me.

haish
sorry i am abit subconsious now.. cos i carn stand it anymore.. the nightmares and stuff.. argh. getting crazy. kaes i feel much better after crapping everything out. anw.. whether its true or false zai yu ni dui wo de xin ren. haish. my hand is seriously trembling when i type. haha. phew.

ps: forget wad i toking.. i am just letting out my troubles in my heart. sorry for the subconsciousness.

2007-03-14T01:49:00.000-07:00

hmmph.. Its wednesday liao. Half of the holiday is gone and i haven do anything! muahaha. -.- ytd we have UNIT HIKE 07!! woots! *cheering and clapping*

overall quite okay.. fun actually but would be "funner" if i never bang my head like abt 6 times??! wah hah! my head still hurt a little now. then have severe muscleache frm the walk... x( this morning i was like trying to get up desperately.. den well, after dunno how long then managed to.. -___-'"

so we started of in the bus, singing o when nanyang out of the school and teaching 41 how to sing it. hmmph. i was in bus one(or isit 2? i forget liao.. isit my head got bang so many times?.. o.o kaes..nvm) with chuie, cam, mc and mama! of course with ma'ams and 41... o yea ms khoo brought her doggy along! so cute lorh! just running abt her legs and barking in a cute doggy tone. -.- but i think i prefer my dog! i can still rmb how i cried when Rocky ran away frm home. it was lost for 3 days 3 nites... surprised that my bro dint cry. cos my bro is closer to Rocky. I guess I developed the gan qing with it though i got a phobia of dogs... ( used to have phobia of dog.. now no more.=D) kaes back to the hike..

then we reach there liao then start woking. duh! if not we stay in the bus. o we really stayed in the bus until ma'ams tell us to go down.-.- then we played some ice breakers. got one is the blindfold and say 1,2,3,4,...39 one.. and another one is arrange according to bdae. so sad my bus lose..but its okay=) weehee. we did banana dance as forfeit. to think that ms chang actually dance so sexily.. -__- hmmph. but then the whole unit joined the dance. =D

then i got to noe my 41 parter called zihan. yarh. dint really tok much. just went asking her and trying to tok to her by asking her class and how is her lsc... -.- and den well she got say jiayou and stuff without me telling which was quite good but then its not shout larh but loud enuf for ppl to hear..(or at least me?) kaes. then we go photo taking then take take take for very long time.

den i guess we started woking.. carn really rmb larh. hmmph then got hornet drill. tts the first time i bang my head. i was like oww. but then continued lying on the floor. ha black out? i dunno cos we were lying on the floor. then continue to wok wok wok. den got one time really got hornet!! wah ha. dint noe until sqms tell me after hike.-.- kaes this time i bang my head even harder! right smash on my forehead. haha. kaes this is true larh. then i was like ow again without saying again. kaes forget me.. i dunno wad i toking.

then we continued woking... singing cheers.. somehow, i suddenly forgotten some lyrics of the song.. but just hum the tune.. i guess ppl will think how come suddenly i say jiayou so loud and then sing so soft. i noe the cheers but not song.. hmph den i rmb that theres a part where we started running up then slope which was so steep. i took a pic of it but then lazy to take camera now.

den dunno when we play dog and bone.. the thing special abt this game is that its not the normal dog and bone but we are labelled letters and then words that are said out with ur letters then u must chase the dog..... yarh so mine was s. o.o i realise i typed dog when its supposed to be bone. muahah. o i knocked my head 2 times there.. i dunno how. then another one time is the worst of all. i dunno how this happen as it happen too fast or sth? i fell flat on the ground with ppl smashing me on top. thats the worst head smasher ever. o then my right arm suddenly very pain. =( dunno why but well its just like tt. =( denwalk back sub consciously with ma'ams asking if i am alright then i when nod nod nod. and dint even noe where my place was then just any how walk to the place.. hmmph then ma'am pass me my rubber band which i drop frm my plates.. (how to spell??) haa i noe i carn spell! tts the worst part of the game cos i dunno how to spell!! kaes then the game continue on.. feel kind of nei jiu when forgot which ma'am (dint see properly! waah.) tap on me and i dint feel it then i dint drop the ball and realise ma'am tap on me when 38ma'ams said that. waahh.. so chi dun okae! so sorry! i think i am very rude tt time. =( haish but carn do anything abt it now..

o then we went continue woking carrying my back with my left arm.. and then ma'am told me to carry my bag properly then i carry it properly. haish. carn say why but yarh. then we played captain ball with 39ma'ams and as usual we lost and won41 with 4,3. i feel so neijiu in bangin in to ma'ams and 41 so many times!! i dint mean to!! i was just...haish nvm. i guess i shld not be so rough. am i? i dunno? i do things subconsciously... i dunno..i really dunno. o then came the 6 head bang.. got tripped and fell hard on the ground. feel so stupid ok.. just one hike then i knock my head like 6 times!! hate it man! as in hate the head knocking parts.

after tt we got debrief within our sqd. aiyah.. overall unit hike is FUN!! (head banging parts which make me feel ~~~and the great fall) (which make my arm hurt so much. now its better liao.)

after tt ate lunch at j8. and took neo print with sqms of course. then went shopping. and mc keep wanting to go treasure hunting for ______.... irritated. then we shop until we dun feel like woking then we went to search for place to sit. and we totally forgot tt there's such a place called food junction which have seats for us to sit. and we were like thinking why carn there be a proper place that we can sit?oni tot of tt when we were abt to go home. we sat there for like dunno how many minutes.. haha and i yarh. we say weilin ma'am and bixuan ma'am at j8 2 times. the second time is like. i heard xia si ren xia si ren.. den i look around huh wad. then nth larh. then staring into the blank space and to realise tt i am staring at them. -__-''

reach home at abt 6.30 shld be larh. then went bathing and eat a good meal cos my aunt and uncle came to stay over. then blablablabla..

wehee i realise i am slacking like wad slackers do now. i think its time i do homework..

schedule for the day:
-finish slacking at 1
-bathe
-eat at 2
-do maths ws 2.2
-revise safety first
-nap? shld be
-polish boots n badge.(but i dun have badge polish..!)
-half of maths ws 2.3
- RUN!! train.. (but most likely carn. my whole body is aching like siao esp my arm)
-eat or bathe (either first)
- ???????

the ??????? are inpromtu.. hehe can slack oso. -__- most likely to be slacking.

[i took 1 hour ++++ to type this post. dunno why guess is the same reason.]]-*

2007-03-10T18:36:00.000-08:00

never blog for a long time. but just came back frm lsc. dint turn out tt well than i expect it to. carn expect much too isn't it? its just destinated and fate that well i dunno. toilets are making be crazy. I wonder ppl really think of the work that have been done behind the scencs... the toilets are so clean and well-prepared so that they can bathe,, do they noe? haish. Sec ones.. i noe they are new to the school but that does not mean anything do they? it does not mean they can just dirty it and then well just leave it for the seniors to do the work. nobody tell them to clean up their own mess. Oh come on... isn't it common sense to clean up after their own mess? why must they be reminded of to clean and after we check.

toilet problems come after one another. some ppl were just ignorant in abiding the rules. In the end what have we come up till? To be their servants and pleading them not to do this and that. We cleaned toilets after toilets, seeing undesirable stuff. Emphasizing that we are not maids and yet becos we are the cleaniness commitee, we have the responsibility to clear up the mess. yea. we are the commitee but we are definitely not maids.

this totally wreck up my lsc. another problem that happen to our class. supposingly, it is a small matter, then now what? Big as it is, interogation have to be carried out and yarh.. why must it be our class man? having toilet problems are already enuf. whats the least you wanted is another problem that irritates us. missing tea breaks, for checking of body, getting our OM props destroyed when seeing whether its there. now we got to restick everything and our paint, got spilled! bag search and everything. I dunno wad can it got untill.

if it was to reach the police station, we will get interogation one by one and then.. haish.nvm.. blame it one fate. what can we do? why must the person be so selfish to create such trouble? why?

lsc.. a total FUN right? * nods head in sacarsn*

[just let it pass by. no more sufferings no more hardships]]-*

2007-02-15T22:24:00.000-08:00

BA cuts... Projects... haiz... wads more

2007-02-12T05:25:00.003-08:00

the antiseptic is killing me!!!!! yeow.... it make it more pain... xp

2007-02-10T11:50:00.000-08:00

as time passes...
eventually ,
realisations occurs.

realistically, things...
will be there
if its meant to be there.

you will realised that after all,
happiness and sadness could not be controlled.
maybe there's time its possible
but yet seemingly,
when sadness is held too far upon your heart,
there will be a time,
emotions will burst out as it is.

Is it better to be forcefully happy?
or is it better to be sad by itself?
Is it better to cry out
or is it better to pretend happiness?

sometimes,
when realisation came to the limit,
you finally do not know what to do,
what to feel.
You are not yourself...

_-* helplessly confused...

2007-02-03T18:26:00.001-08:00

tmr got maths test liao... and you know what, my statistics suxs like as if it ever rock before! but its more suck than b4. I dun understand a single bit. o yarh... i deleted my chinese blog for your info sqms.. so i can also write chinese blogs here too! yeah=) woots. why am i rejoicing since i am desperate for statistics. i must be mad. I decided that everyday shall be a happy day and shall not sulk as much as possible yea! sorry for daoing you all sqms.. eh after dalt that time i was daoing everyone.. sorry! i feel very not in the mood. just feel bad... sucky. you know... everything that happened to me these days are all against me. so please know me. i lost my art and need to redraw. Then, I have this sucky calculator which made me unable to complete my geography test which is meant to be easy. Then ytd, i lost my NEW socks. My bro keep calling me gay. I feel like exploding.. o yarh i am suppose to be happy. =) yaay!!

kaes so sorry for dao-ing you all kaes? haiz.. i just hope next week things wouldn't be against me. the thing i hate most is the calculator. and also one thing i think i am going to fail my combined humanities. i have done badly for my geog and then history... a subject of terror. how am i going to pass ch? moreover, i got this t------ that does not know how to t----! i feel like exploding when ever she enters. it totally destroy my mood the whole day. haish...

u noe my feeling.

2007-01-31T21:14:00.000-08:00

Do you ever had this chance to feel that the world is filled with unjustice? Or even feel that equality is not shared upon human beings? Or even feel like screaming and shouting and yet you carn? You want to find something to put your anger on, find someone to tok to... Have you?! Maybe you just dun understand what i mean. If you dun den forget it.

Here is the piece of information to you that the world is truely round. I rather it be square! Why must it be round in the first place which cause all the sufferings? WHY must it be round. Did you noe why the world is round? Cos there's never a moment of fairness and squareness. NOTHING in this world is fair. Its the roundness that causes it all. ROUND .. earth... why must it be round. It is because it is round thats why the world is full of sufferings. I really wondered why must the world in the first place be round? If it is square, everything would just be fair and square. AND there will be fairness among people. Things will all be peaceful... no discrimination among each other.

I really feel very unfair. To think that i got this... forget it.

- Roundness filled the air -
]]* when can it be square then? i really hope upon the arrival of this day...

2007-01-27T22:04:00.000-08:00

It is suppose to be my leisure. It is suppose to relieve me from homework. It is suppose to be my hobby, my liking. BUT now, it piled up my stress. lessons are appreciated not to have. teacher only scold and scold cos its not good. its just not up to standard to her. its hard to explain to someone who never gone through what you have gone through.

[[yea yea SUPPOSe... this word suppose... wads the use of supposing something when its really not it!? as in, if it is suppose to be like that and it is like that, you would not add the word suppose. suppose is just things that are not completed or carn be done. like you see it suppose to be my leisure but it isn't. thats why i added the word suppose... kaes.. i think i am speaking sense and you all may not be able to understand... *balek! i am not looking down on you... just saying that i am thinking too much* ]]

i would like it if there isn't stress upon it. i mean there's too much work to be done and do you expect me to have the time to practice and to make it perfect like you wish? was told to practice more. but the thing is.. where is the time? how can i find time? i seriously need some time management. no... everyday is packed up with activities. by the time i reach home, i will bathe, eat, and there already isnt enuf time for homework how am i being expected to practice it?

actually... i like to play when i am too stress up but not the things that i am forced to play. but the things that i like to play. especially the sad ones. it usually take up the time and kind of relieve stress. it may take up an hour but i dun care i got no mood for others.

actually... haish. i dun really now what to say abt it but if there isn't stress put upon it, i would really really like it.

2007-01-21T22:55:00.000-08:00

A sense of nothingness filled your soul. You know that there are alot of things to do, yet unable to complete them. Feeling that you do not know what to start with. Even if there is a goal in your heart, you still cannot step aside and complete your goal. Why is it so is because a sense of helplessness filled your mind and soul. Thinking of the plenty of tasks... feeling very frustrated because you do not know which one to start with. Your mood, everything will be destructed. Not a single feeling of urge to complete them.

All you feel like is to sleep. Get over with it. Hoping that things will be over soon and you do not need to complete your tasks. But is that possible? Not really. The reality is that you cannot escape from what is destinied and given to you. You must have the responsibility to fulfil it. But you know you cannot do it well. You need encouragement. But I guess what you need is your heart, your soul, your mind and the passion to complete the task given to you. You will feel better even you get results that is not your expectations because you had tried your very best.

Self consoling maybe good too. There's a bright sight to look on you know that... so don't bother to even look at the dark sight. Just keep going and going, trying and trying. Do your best and be your best at all circumstances.

Yea yea... this maybe possible for some people. But supposingly, to me, it seemed hard enough. I know, I know I should just have try my best. But the thing is you got no mood now and you expect me to do things i dun wan to.

Hope i can get the mood right.

2007-01-19T21:17:00.000-08:00

the vision turns blur. then carn see, then white. its really literal. then it is impossible not to dun sit down. you feel that the food in your tummy is floating, the urge for vomiting increases. headache eventually turns into getting giddy. giddiness will lead to unwell and even fainting.
sounds chim? but nah. it really happens. really happens when no one realises. everyone is in the mist of business. so busy, that the surrounding happenings, were treated as nothing.

ytd is the beggining of the spinning world. till today. the world is rapidly spinning, unstoppable. happens only to one individual but soon everyone will get affected. unknowingly, they will feel the world is spinning more than you feel it is. am i mentioning about the globe rotating. well sadly, no. supposingly, it dun happen like that. it dun pass on to other people. it isnt contagious. but now it is. the world has changed. changed so fast that you dunno wad just happen. as i say, the world is spinning. u carn even see a single thing when the world spins so fast.

is this type of feeling familiar to you? i guess not. in my life. i nvr experience it b4, dun wan to experience it but also wish i dint experience it. it only happens today. as i say the world has been spinning since ytd. so spinny that no one understand why it is so. that includes me, myself. its unexplainable but just a bunch of things that are kept inside and is impossible for one to express it out.

today. went for act. as i already said. the head has been spinning since morning. when i see the lion, rite infront of me. its really making my head spin and hurt. this type of feeling is nan shou yet very hard to speak out, or even telling someone abt it, u will feel u had add on trouble to them. i was like staring at the lion, frien keep speaking to me. cannot dun ans. dun wan make them suspect.

during act. head was aching more than usual. not to tok abt the sun that irritate my eyes. this causes more headache. now lets see the maths equation. 2 x headache + headache = chao qi super headache. this makes me giddy. carn concentrate much you see. but yet u dun wan to cos trouble. BUT YET when the whole world finally stop turning and turns black... it causes more trouble.

waterbreaks are even worst. feeling thirsty yet feel like puking. wad would there be more than this suffering. but then managed to cheng until changing quater slacks. went into toilet. with correct attire. change half way, the symdrom of giddiness, black and white world came upon me. i sit down on the ground the daydream awhile. then continued, with much difficulties.

during knots and lashing. sat down for long time. plenty time to get back to full cunciousness. but then still got abit headache. luckily i dint faint ok. almost did. if was release minutes later. dunno wad else may happen but fainting is wad i dun wan most to happen. after that helped to take the boxes up. that one still ok. but then when carry to np room. wah seh. zao bu lai, wan bu lai, pian pian zai na ge shi jian. headache again. wad the heck is happening to me.

then finally carry to np room. almost cannot walk liao. almost have leg cramp. its damn pain sia. then went home with post-leg cramp syndrome. very good lorh. at home will have to try to walk properly to hide from my parents lorh. great job. yohoo. kaes. haiz.

thats just wad happened today. its destroyed by the world. cos its spinning. blame on it.

2007-01-18T20:46:00.000-08:00

wah seh. feel so heavy today. my head. its totally unbearable. if you noe how it feels like, you will noe wad i toking. its just very heavy which make it like so freakingly giddy and pain. i can just lie down there, and there i am sleeping very soundly.

dun think its just a normal tired. i dunno ytd i stayed up late to type the script and do all the homework. then this morning feeling my head very heavy. but after awhile okay liao. then during OM, its turned giddy again. what the fish. dun really have the strength to write.

i rmb last time when i almost fainted. the time during pe lesson where all my vision turn white and i carn see anything and was like feeling very nauseous and wanting to vomit, yarh.. i got this feeling but my vision dint turn white. and that time i also slept very late. practically i think i am the only living soul in the house that nite. ytd's nite oso.

i seriously dun like the zi wei of almost fainting. its terrible, horrible! if you eva noe that feeling, you will noe. haiz. third class is like so soon. i feeling very petrified. my boots.. i dunno wad to say abt it but bleahs i think its damn dull and not shiny at all.

the zi wei of fainting is long and unbearable. you wun feel well at all. you wun even wan to have a tot of it lorh. its so wargh. just the type of feeling that its very unwell. happens when have not enough sleep, dint eat breakfast, or dunno wad thing. haish. resting is the most important thing. but then, i still got tons of things yet to be done. you think how can i not stay up late? haiz...

_*- in serious need of rest-]

2007-01-15T18:11:00.000-08:00

i feel damn dumb.. i am saying things subconsciously lorh. i dint noe i wad i said until i was told abt it. so dumb rite?

it happened during third class.. no mock third class. it was my turn to be i/c... then so ma'am called me. i shouted yes ma'am. then kaes.. *resumes as normal* when i report to ma'am, i was subconsciously saying good morning ma'am instead of good afternoon ma'am. when ma'am says samula.. i dint realise wads wrong u noe... until i ask sqms today then i was like " really meh? i got say morning arh? i dint noe eh!!" i really dint noe i said good morning. i can say my brain is not functioning properly. haiz...

the thing is i dint noe wad i say when i report back. sqms say i said afternoon liao cos they think i realise. but the thing is.. i dunno i say morning or afternoon. and i dint realise until today. i feel so idiotic okay! to think that i was saying good morning ma'am and afternoon ma'am subconsciously. seriously why i dunno arh. i got no ying xiang liao.. o yea.. that nite.. i dunno how i slept and i dint i even noe i was in the bed liao. that was like er.. cos usually i think b4 sleeping.. then that morning i was like..hmmph. thinking wad i thought ytd arh? then i was like thinking thinking... then i tot. "eh.. how i sleep in the first place? when i get here? i dun rmb brushing teeth... i dun rmb taking my bosters to the dilam. where is my pooh arh?" i was like slept without my pooh for the first time except when i go camp. i am doing weird things that day.. haiz..

dumb me..

2007-01-12T05:32:00.001-08:00

YAY!! this post is my number forty post! haha. wohoo! FORTY JIAYOU!...
FOR THIRD CLASS ESP.!! AND ALL THE TESTS LARH! sqms, we are overcoming the tests together, so we should not give up, must hang on there and JIAYOU! we can do it!

o yea.. haha today is MOCK THIRD CLASS>>> but i practically keep thinking that today is the real one.. dunno why leh. o.. then ytd we were like practicing drills after school. then.. haiz. i dun get why sqms just carn get serious. its like the third class is today and yet they still can fool around. and laugh here laugh there and not serious. well, sorry sqms larh. but i hope u can be more serious in practicing drills. its just no use practicing drills when we all are fooling around. time is precious u noe... then horh yarh larh so hope we can be more serious. kaes.. i realise i wrote something wrong infront.. i wrote that third class is today. haiz. anw its mock third class to correct myself.

mock third class tt time.. wah seh... u noe horh, so giddy u noe. dunno why larh, i am not a genius to noe why i giddy. and horh, i am feeling so full that i feel like puking lorh. then i was there standing there.. mumbling "dont faint" .."dun faint" . i dun wan to cause trouble and i think its very diu lian lorh. faint. o yarh. i dun think sqms noe abt this. cos i kept it in my heart. but i carn stand it!!! i have to say it to someone. so i write it here lorh. i dun care who see liao larh. just hope none of my family members sees this. and sensored ppl. haha actually i dunno who is sensored from seeing this. kaes. then i think i was like shaking as in like "fall" to the front but dint fall larh.. duh and the "fall" to the back. almost fell down a few times. so stupid larh. either i carn balance out of the sudden or else is trip over my own leg or the floor is wet or for dunno wad reason larh.

when my turn reach. i was like " die liao.. scarly i faint" then was like damn nervous... then march to ma'am then blablabla..( to as normal). then there was one part where i was thinking to let the squad march in the tengah position facing standed front then i dunno wad i thinking.. i noe i nid to turn them but then horh, i crazy le or wad i go march to the side. i was like stand there.. thinking" why i come here arh" then i march back.. so dumb okay. i really noe tt i am suppose to turn them. i was like whenever i almost fall.. no or jus going front and back like bu dao wong like tt... i clutch my fist so hard tt now got marks liao. haiz...

i oso keep banging on my own leg which is like oww? my whole leg is practically red now.. as in the foot..hmmh not foot.. aiyah the leg larh.

i think i dint do well in this attempt lorh. seriously. my mind is filled with"dun faint" haiz. i should have concentrate more. zhen shi de. i think i hai the squad in the sqd drills several times which i really really sorry. SORRY SQMS!!! really SORRY!!! haiz. did i put in my utmost effort? i can say i dint. cos as i say i am thinking of other stuff. i think i should have try but i carn ... i already tried?!! haiz. i very scared i pull the squad down leh. i dun wan the sqd just becos of me then fail third class leh. i hope i can just do things correctly at once.

sqms.. sorry for tuo lei-ing the sqd! haiz.. anw... sqm muz jiayou for the real one okay? i just hope i dun have the same situation as today. i keep thinking today is real third class and i should have treat it as a real one but then... haiz. nvm. its better not to repeat so many times.
*******
i feel very tired now. sad... can we just like have a year of holiday? i am tired of everything.. even getting out of the bed. i want to have a break, a rest. haiz. my results are lousy. why are everyone so clever? and i am so like totally opposite? haiz. i wan to grow taller!! i dun wan to be a shortie!!! I WAN TO BE TALLIE! waah. why must i be so short. yea yea wadeva.

o today health check and i shrunk u noe.. so dumb rite.? and i lost weight too! used to be 40? i think but now its 37... and u noe that chuxi thinks she is over weight lorh.. but the truth is that... she is underweight. tt is really really well i dunno. i wanna grow i wanna grow!!! haiz... i wan to be at least 160 cm which is abit hard...haiz.
*******
o yea ytd i was frantically polishing my boots which is like going darker and darker... then i was like" how how how" then very scared.. i polish untill i cry okay! then u noe my father beside still saying abt polishing no use one.. is only those last time the army nothing to do then go polish. then say what ... wad they care now is technology.. see the police now dun even polish then were got so wu liao do such thing lorh. and also say that polish is last time ppl dumb then do cos they nothing to do.. then say wad.. if ppl noe u down there polishing boots... they will say i dumb.. then keep saying like as if u can make it more shiny.. and then was saying that so shiny for wad use lorh.. no use. and keep saying stuff to discourage me.. like what the!? i was really desperate lorh. why isit that no matter how hard i try to do something and yet it doesn't comes out as i wan to.??!

sqms keep saying my boots liang. its really really an insult to me lorh. i feel very zi bei u noe. they ming ming noe my boots not liang still say my boots. liang. i cried this morning when they confessed that my boots is finally not liang. i really dun understand they say my boots is liang lorh. then they help me polish while i was like despo doing some homework i dunno how to do and found out how.. then i was like looking at the paper then the words all blur blur one cos my tears was on the verge on dropping out. i dun even think sqms noe this larh. i really very sad to think that sqms think my boots is liang. i not saying they insulted me but well i feel really sad to think of that sqms de boots all so shiny compared to my dukk shoes and yet they say my is liang. i noe they trying to be qian xu abt their boots or trying to console me or something but i really dunno. i wan to burst out liao okay..

o then my parents dun really like me being in np. but the thing is i like np.. except____ haiz. i look forward to it lorh and i dun wan to leave sqms! they wan me to quit. they say my results are deproving. argh! and i willl not leave it no matter wad..! haha i am a bad girl but i dun care. i think when i grow up i will think i am childish and gu zhi. but so wad.. the future is the future.. i will just have to study harder and prove tt i can still get good results though i am in np!
*******
HARH! i should stop toking abt stuff like that.. should be cheerful lalal!! yay!! yarh tmr shipmates coming to my house! maybe larh.. not confirmed yet! haha.
then friday chuxi, jung, celesting and yingshi coming. then monday got school liao. hao sian orh.. i think i should sleep early today.. very tired...EXTREMELY TIRED>>

nitez...

PS: JIAYOU FOR THIRD CLASS SQUADMATES!!

2007-01-10T22:13:00.000-08:00

no one understands me. yea. i keep things to my heart.. tts why. i dun wan them to noe abt wad i tot. is there a problem with it? i haven touch the com for long but things surely happened. i dunno but i feel that everything tt had happened till now is all becos of me. i caused all the tragic isn't it? maybe asking have i been thinking too much at nite... no well, maybe? i dunno. but i reflected on myself. i tot tt i sux. i dunno but i just think so. well my hand is hurting me now for dunno wad reason. haiz.

why in the first place must I...ME.. be in here and cause everyone to suffer? i really hate myself. i can do nothing right. i nvr expect things to be so complicated behind the scenes but well it just happened. i really really dun noe. up till now i think no one noes wad i really thinking. but just to let u noe tt i am frustrated and pissed. haaiz

i am just as speechless as i can be...

2007-01-03T06:07:00.001-08:00

GOALS in 2007
in the year coming ahead of 2007, i decided that things really had to change. ppl seemed to hate me. (i think) i got this impression of that. cos i was often left out. in talks when they are talking to each other, i tried to join in but they just left me out of the circle. what's wrong with me? really i dun understand why they hate me or isit they dun mean it but dint realise my existence. i feel left out always.

kaes i am suppose to talk abt my goals. yarh so i feel left out and i think i was being hated. what in me am i bad? tell me. i wan to change. well. okaes.. maybe i just not sociable enough? so because of this ... i decided to

1) try and be cheerfull always and help ppl who are in need.
2) try to participate in activies and not be egoistic. (am i ego? i dunno)

yea and then because i think my results are really very lousy. i think i should really spend more time in my studies. i dunno but i feel bad letting my mum down for so many times. she has high hopes on me and that i am having results that does not meet her expectations. i really dun wan her to worry. i think she's under alot of stress with her work now that school reopened. teaching a psle class even. what could be better then not to let her worry and be a good child? my mum says i had been going out frequently these few days and asked me what type of friends had i been with until i go out so many times a week. well, i like going out with sqms but well its just hard to say and make this choice. i dun wan her to think so much and yet i wan to go out with sqms. maybe i should really go out when nessasary. but... I WAN TO GO OUT WITH SQMS! kaes i am being too.. eh dunno larh. so after much thoughts. u noe i always think... i felt that i should:

3)study hard for this year and get good results
4) be ready to control myself so that i wun get tempted to go out with sqms that frequently. (i think i carn reach this goal)

i think i am getting fatter and heavier. i dunno.. my stamina is deproving i hope i can run long dist. i wan to get gold ,30 points this year. every year, my napfa results have been improving. u noe, from primary4, i got bronze. primary 5 is silver. primary 6 got gold, 25 points. then this year... not last year, i got gold 28 points. so this year i should get gold 30 points! i dunno whether its possible for me cos my stamina deproved, the flexibity deproved, everything related to napfa deprove!.. i nid to get gold 30 points! if not i die i DIE! i have to get 30 points i noe u dun understand me but i have to! i HAVE TO!...so well i decided to go running every 5.30 pm! yay! then bring my dog out for walks! my dog has been desperate for walks. we dint bring him out for long time liao. now every time the gate open, he will run out.. rocky is despo! opps forgot to say its/his name is rocky! but we called him rock usually and my bro call him baby.. (very err!) kaes mind that guy. so i will be:

5)running at 5.30pm everyday
6) bring rocky out!

yarh and then my room is damn messy okay? but now that i had tidied it up, it is averagely average tidy room. still messy larh. so i think horh, i should keep my room as tidy as possible.=) i dunno everything i do work, my desk will be filled with paper and pens and all sorts of rubbish. then in the end i was so tired then dint clear them then i will just anyhow sai the paper in to some file. then well the file exploded one day and the paper will be all over... so seems that i as a sec 2 girl already, should take responsibilty of my room and not abandon the authority of having a room. last tine i dun have my own room. i had longed for one and now i had it so i must keep it as neat as possible!.. so...

7) keep tables neat and tidy

and yea this year, i pass up work punctually and i shall continue that! ehh... and well i got a job this year! as in class comittee! yipee! woots. and this year... out monitress is ...*drum roll*.... SARAH! and ass.mon is ... XIAO EN! okays we noe xiaoen is stressed out when she was a monitress so we decided to make her the ass mon!.... not a bad word just a short form for assistant monitress! actually there's still many goals but lazy to type liao .. maybe next time bah!

2007-01-01T15:00:00.000-08:00

HAPPY
NEW
YEAR!

2007 has reached!

haha okaes..i made this picture when i am bored just now.. made up of ^_/\ and some pictures! here it is:

used microsoft words and ms paint.

yay! managed to upload it! woots.. there's a few times i tried to post some overseas pictures but dunno why cannot but now can. yay! why arh? maybe its 2007, a new year and also a new start and new knowledge gained! woots! kaes i am high these few days.. cos i trying to be as happy as possible b4 school starts!

o yea.. on monday, opps not monday today is monday.. on wednesday we were told to bring...
1)ice box
2)non-disposable poncho
3) candles...

and u noe my ice box damn big.. draw for you to see..

da daa!! first day of school bring such a big thingy... a bit siao but nvm. i think ma'am want a big one..=p haha

figurin how to play minesweeper..
haiz
and.. finally one of the worst records:

haha.. my best record is the un-pertatic number of 24.. so lousy man. haiz.

yea.. shall go read tkam le!

2007-01-01T11:15:00.000-08:00

ehh yea.. continue with yesterday! i am high ytd haha... most of it i am toking... so continues the chat..

宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D has been invited into the conversation.

*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
hello kathy
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
kathy...
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
cheer 2007 on
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
10 mins left
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
so it can bear until 12am
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
heh
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
yeah!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou 2007!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
you can do it
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
bear in crawling?
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
10 minutes more
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
=.-
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
lol
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
as in cheng de zhu
{*me*} says:
huh
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou!
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
OH

then i told her how i high i am.. as in wad i said..then..

*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
crawl faster 2007!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
can see finishing line liao
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
and u 2006.. kuai dian go larh!
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
lol
{*me*} says:
haha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
9 minutes more!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
u can do it...
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
just keep swimming just keep swiming
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou 2007!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
shoo 2006
{*me*} says:
hahaha
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
7 mins more!!
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
SWIM FASTER
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
win the olympics!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
haha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
kuai dian
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
4 minutes!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
quick
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
break the record!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou 2007
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007! jiayou ! 2007 GO! 2007! jiayou ! 2007 GO!2007! jiayou ! 2007 GO!2007! jiayou ! 2007 GO!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
we will we rock you hah!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007 jiayou!
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
lol
宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫宫。。。。。 Such a wonderful, sweet fairy tale... :) LA-Los Angeles,Language Arts:D says:
so high
{*me*} says:
lalala
{*me*} says:
3 more minutes!!
{*me*} says:
JIAYOU
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2008
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
opps
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2008 dun come horh
{*me*} says:
haaha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
go away
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007!
{*me*} says:
2008 we will be ncos
{*me*} says:
as in 2008 july like tt
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2008 come come jiayou
{*me*} says:
'(h5)(h5)(h5)(h5)(h5)
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
1 minute!
{*me*} says:
to 2007
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
GO GO GO!
{*me*} says:
(h5)(h5)(h5)(h5)(h5) 2007 WO MEN YONG YUAN ZHI CHI NI
{*me*} says:
-.-
{*me*} says:
haha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
10
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
9
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
8
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
7
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
6
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
5
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
4
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
3
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
1
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
YAY!!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007 u finally reach!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007 u come liao!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
waah now i noe how u look like
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
2007!
{*me*} says:
YAYY
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
woots

kaes anw.. still got many high sensations but now got to eat liao.. later blog abt it again!

2006-12-31T23:28:00.000-08:00

COUNTDOWN TIME!!!! woots!
according to my com clock, still got 32 more minutes to 2007! arent u excited?! actually i am not.... Cong is counting down with me currently. so sad no sqms online o and kathy is oso counting down with me! as in not directly what i mean is counting down online!
28 more minutes! lalala.. i painted this picture on np... the more i look the more i feel its nice! woots.. i did alot of hands on on np. i folded straw stars and painted them red, yellow, blue, green consecutively. then painted nynp then paste another straw. and i am being lame .. see? :

*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
haha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
31 more minutes!!
{*me*} says:
yes
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
26 minutes!
{*me*} says:
24 more minutes
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
yea!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou 2007
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
crawl faster
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
u can do it 2007!
{*me*} says:
haha
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
msg to 2006: hello 2006. you seem to be crawling very fast... to me but well in dint quite zhen xi you and now u are going off. you evil 2006. and sorry i dint treasure u larh. now u are dying but since u are dying, die faster! let 2007 run in larh. dun let 2007 suffer as it crawls in.
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
but anw thanks 2006. best wishes for you!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
msg to the yet to be born 2007:
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
HI 2007! u will be the new year everyone is waiting for! (year is a type of species like us humans)
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
JIAYOu 2007 ! dun let 2006 beat u off!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
just 16 more minutes to bear
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
i noe its long but 2007, ucan do it!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
cong say something to 2007
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
CONG!!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
u evil dint jiayou for 2007
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
anw 2007 dun be sad muz...bear
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
we are bearing with u
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
dun slack okay?
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
jiayou!
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
but after 18 minutes, u must slow down horh
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
so we can catch our breathe
*//sucess is not final, failure is not fatal. it is the courage to continue that counts! so jiayou bah!\\* says:
evil cong still not saying anything to cheer 2007

.. yea very high..nxt time blog abt it..
gtg liao..ahh

2006-12-31T15:29:00.000-08:00

got nothing to do leh.. so decided to blog again!but wad to blog abt leh? *think think think*..... *no replies from brain* haiz. i noe! shall post some phrases for you all to think abt. and understand it. i think its quite meaningful larh these phrases.

*Yearn to understand first and to be understood second.
---Beca Allen
*We can't direct winds, but we can adjust the sails.
--P. Martin Peters
*Nothing can be accomplished without enthusiasm
-- Kenneth E. Anderson
*Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear-not absence of fear
--Mark Twain
*True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and excercise of the body; the two are ever united
--Humboldt
*The one real object of education is to have a man in the condition of continually asking questiongs.
-- Bishop Mandell Creighton
*Failure is only the oppurtunity to more intelligently begin again.
--Henry Ford
*Vision is the art of seeing invisible
--Jonathan Swift
*Adventure is not outside a man. It is within
--David Grayson
*What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.
--Zig Ziglar
*There are many things which we can afford to forget which it is yet well to learn
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

yarh... can think through it. i dunno why i post this but i said i got nth to do liao mah. o yea.. actually there's more but i dun think its meaningful to me and i got something to do liao and i tired of typing liao.

2006-12-31T15:14:00.000-08:00

disappointed my mother again. i hope i can dun disappoint her anymore. isn't there just one day that i can do things correctly? i keep making mistakes and cause her to be disappointed. i dunno but everyone do make mistakes but the number of mistakes i made is definitely more than others. well, i tried to change myself for the better but still i make mistakes. why isit that how i try not to make mistakes, i still dun succeed? i really hope there would be one day i can dun disappoint her anymore and let her be worry free. well, maybe i should say that i am still a kid.. no not a kid a yet to be grown adult. we do make mistakes as we grow i noe that. i am saying this is not because i wan to say my mum dun noe this but well i am trying to console myself. anws, i just hope not to disappoint her anymore. o yeah i should be happy and not this sad tone again.
YAY! I WILL NOT DISAPPOINT HER ANYMORE! WOOTS! hmmph.. this is abit too sarcastic. but anw i realise that sadness cannot be withdraw. as in you cannot control yourself when you are sad. so dun blame me when i write this kind of posts...

2006-12-31T10:31:00.000-08:00

LAST DAY OF 2006...
today is the last day of 2006. to think that tmr is 2007, is very very weird for me. this year seemed to pass so fast? like a bullet train to me. in the year's work, time seemed to pass by me unknowingly. to me, its just like yesterday is just the first day of school in 2006, and now its nearing the end of it. its like 13 and a half hour more to 2007. that is well just too fast.
i still can remember that this year's lifeskills camp. the talentime esp. though its quite a last minute work we still got third for that. actually i dun really rmb it well. that time we went botanic garden for the alumni games day. jung said that we came here during life skills camp and i have not a single idea that we came here. haiz its just long term memory short. but maybe its not long enough to be long and not short enough to be short... so it shall be middle term memory short. yeah=)...haha.
though i dint start 2006 with a very good start.. to me i dint. i think i should end it with a good end. even though my sqd aim to make the squad tee before 2006 end but to some circumstances like the shop is not open, we were unable to finish our shirt. and supposingly were are suppose to change the colour of our sqd tee which is suppose to be black. but wad colour can it be? i dint quite enjoy my days overseas as i kept thinking abt farewell 2006. i swear i would not go overseas nxt year at farewell. haiz.. so you gonna count down to 2007? yeah of course. well the past few posts are all in sad tone and is in depressed type of mood. well, i guess being sad is not it and isnt it better to be happy?
though happiness is always accompanied by anxiety, i thought that being happy is better that being sad always. i shall aim to be happy everyday! lalala. but it is still sad that 2006 near its end i decided to have a good start for 2007. now i realise i am on page 40 of tkam only but its good! i am on 40 unknowingly that means i have yuan with 40! nvm i am lame just becos i am on pg40 b4 i blog, i say i have yuan with 40.. but its true.. i was abt to complain in this blog that i am still on page wad ever and to realise i am on my sqd's page. haha nvm.
woots! actually i oso dunno why i say woots but just trying to be happy. later have tuition so i shall go prepare liao!

2006-12-30T00:29:00.001-08:00

WAAH!! maths worksheet 2 is a torture..
who noes how to do it?!! i am currently dying becos of it..haiz some kind soul save me.. waah how to do larh. how how.. dun wan to copy oso. haiz. wahh larh how to do sad leh. kaes..nvm shall learn frm ppl when school starts. 5 questions only anw. haha. i said learn not copy okay? haiz. so sad ok? nvm. but if not i would finish all my homework accept finish tkam. ='(

and can dun print result slip? sad.. my results very lan..
sobs... later to will dun allow us to go alot of place liao larh. waah. i dun wan to give. i dun wan!! but can i do anything abt it? no.. that's the problem. i very scared next year cannot get jiang xue jin. then break record. my cuzz sure laugh one. sobs.. boo!!BOO! well nvm. all that is over carn be change so must well study harder now. hope nxt year can get all a.. thats crazy but i wan to! i dun wan to make my mum disappointed. i think she noes that i dun like her to scold me tts why she dint scold me often these feel days. but i noe she is disappointed. or isit she given up in me? no no. choy! i noe she cares for me i noe, i really do. but these few days, she dun scold me for going home late is really very weird. i just feel very nei jiu somehow cos i think i disappointed her umpteen times despite her telling me so many times to come home earlier to study. i noe she wans me to get better results. haiz. but.. haiz. i like to go out with sqms... sometimes i am tempted but i decided that shouldnt let her worry any more. i just wan to help out.
u noe one night i was thinking abt my mum and her job b4 sleeping. u noe i always do tt. tt was when i realised my mum had been very tired after all these years. so i decided to lighten up my mum's burden and be a more thoughtful child. she wakes up early in the morning like abt 4-5am to get prepared for work then wakes me up at 5.30am. usually i will take a long time getting brush up so tts why i nid to wake up so early and she nids to wake so early too. then she will fetch me to school and then to hers. (she teaches in a pri school) she always come home at abt 6. then all she does was marking. sometimes she can even mark till late night yet she still haven finish her work. she only sleeps like 4 hours. and still worry for us. i really hope i can help her. then i realise tt wad i can help is to guan hao zi ji first. haiz.
just hope she wun be so tired out....

2006-12-28T13:45:00.000-08:00

monday that day, sqms went to beach road to buy twine. but i carn go. surely one lorh. then today, initially got act but now no more so was told to be at home. but today got no sqd meeting larh.. i dunno how is the innovative ideas going to be. but i definitely hope it will be okay. just now managed to do stats ws 1 and question1 of stats ws 2. dun really understand tt ws though. now dun feel like doing anything liao. too tired out. tmr got alumni games day and today my muscles are aching. hope they wun ache tmr. got no bus guides.. haiz. though its not compulsory, i still hope i have one. dunno what will happen tmr. i only noe that will be travelling around singapore and doing something like amazing race.

2006-12-27T20:16:00.000-08:00

feeling down right more then usual. brothers.. big brothers.. they are irritating aren't they? well not all but a few. but why isit me, mine? haiz. promote then promote larh. good for you can promote to sergeant. congratulations larh.. fine? i still private very funny meh? laugh laugh laugh. still 'cursed' me that haha i cannot shout surely fail. what a bro is that. ask him how to tie this, tie that, what he say? aiyah just anyhow tie larh.. suibian i also dunno. what an answer is this? shall not criticise him anymore but i am irritated. not onli once this happens like well... last time and recently. i really cannot bear the thought of it. even though he is good at times but i suddenly forget what good he did to me. only rmb he let me use the com today. and taking abt tt. keep bullying me one lorh. hit my back so hard. then he still say where got he dint use strength at all. omg.. is that the reason why i stand weirdly in sedia position? i just thought of it.. can it be? hitting someone's back will cause someone to stand weirdly... true or false? nvm. i noe i like complaining in this blog but what i am saying are facts... haiz.
today camelia got damn late for her interview. i hope she can still get into the interview. i think it is very important. her mum doesn't noe she come for np i think as in come for dalt. i really pray that she will be okay. hope she will. i really wish so. but i dun noe what happen. is she sad or happy now. later she sad i call her then disturb her. just hope that she will get look after by her god. i hope she's okay......
today is the day jung will be back but dunno what time the plane fly so wun noe when she reach. so cannot call her. so haiz nvm.. very tired now. went melia's house to discuss innovative ideas. waah think here think there.. carn think of anything. gave some stupid ideas but sure wun xing de tong de. tmr nid it liao. how leh.. our ideas definitely not innovative larh. haiz. then think until cannot think liao. o yarh we also teach siu the lashings. and after innovative we watch charlie and the chocolate factory. nice but the oompa loompa damn irritating. hate it. they are very .....very...very...nvm.. shall have no comments.
still feeling down now. dunno why but just feel that way. somehow. why? yea yea dun feel like laughin thats it great yarh tts it. ok. shall be it... so just sad cos of tt. kaes. no mystery liao

2006-12-26T19:01:00.000-08:00

to ponder or not to ponder? to get irritated or not to get? to be making a fuss over this or not? well i dont know but yet.. i cant keep it in my heart. so wad if i am a girl and doesnt nid to go NS? isn't it a responsibility for all to protect singapore and make sure that there is peace? isn't it good to be fit and not a weakling who doesn't know how to do pumping, who would be out of breathe in just running 1.6? isn't it here and there......? i dont really understand why but its abit bias or what. saying that my bro join np because he needs to practice for NS... so a girl cannot join np because of interest meh? i like np so what... cannot stop me right? i know i am abit rude here but its not that i want to comment on such a thing. but... but but.. i feel unjustified. really. i down there polishing boots.. then splurted out that my boots is so no shiny and how arh how arh..saying that mine will be the most NOT shiny one in the squad..saying that sure die one.. then just because of that, ___ started saying that polish so shiny for what? so shiny already polish for what? not like you will get something with it right? not like it will help your results or what? not like your bro can get coporal or sergeant or staff sergeant right? then still polish?
then i say (in a very frustated mood) feel like bashing __liao but haiz..," what? it reflects on my attitude okay? i got the heart to polish the boots and you tell me dont polish? my lance corporal test is mark on my uniform okay? where got polish for nothing?" i think i am abit too pissed out i really feel like shouting and screaming!?
then __ say that so what? you join np then polish boots. get a rank so what? not like your brother get staff sergeant or something then NS can go for lesser period. your brother join np so he can train for ns.. then ......." the nagging cant seem to stop. i feel like i m going to burst out soon. can feel smoke coming out from my ears, mouth, nose... what the larh.
you think i can dont think about this? you think i can dont get irritated? you think i can dont make a fuss? you think you think... well you are not me you wont understand one. and if i am not angry over this, i should be ashamed..

2006-12-26T03:25:00.000-08:00

i dun noe why i am typing this but my hands just seem to be controling me. i am just string into the blank space, feeling very tired out after the day's activity. i dun even noe wad i wan to say in this post. but i just feel like posting cos supposingly if i dun post today it will be hard for me to post another day. cos.. bro will be fighting over it..what to say leh.. my back aching now.. dunno why . leg is red because of banging umpteen times..(wadeva you spell it) muscle aching.. and why i am saying this cos i nothing to say. haiz. i noe this is a wasted post. but so wad larh. haiz.. maybe i should go polish my boots. but very tired.. maybe i should go practice third class.. but very tired.. maybe i should practice caiqing sequence.. how many times must say but very tired. haiz. just feel like staring out in the air and waah.. like a baby. kaes thats probably taking more energy. cannot sleep yet haven eat. haven discuss innovative ideas on msn. haven do alot of things.. argh... why carn i have a minute of rest. i feel totally tired out. had been encouraging my junior to join np. but dint force her. also ask her to pull more friends into np.. so tt we will meet our target. which i think is very low. and i think could be higher. but high expectations will lead to high disappointment and my bro is back from the dinner. how great is that. later cannot discuss innovative ideas liao. and my bro is totally drenched out which is a normal thing for me.=.- haha maybe not for you. heard that my blog the font is bold and hard to read. why arh? shall try to ammend it. and should i change my blogskin? lazy to change.. i lazy to do everything liao larh.. haiz.ever since that post with plenty of haiz, i habit in typing haiz and saying haiz. almost type haiz again. wad eva and o yarh merry belated christmas! thats for everyone.=) shall blog about the yikes christmas i got this year next time. its just totally insane.

2006-12-23T21:56:00.000-08:00

how do you all sleep?
juz lie down on the bed and there you are asleep?
tts surely not me... i like to think b4 i go to sleep on the bed.. think of wad? actually, i can think of anything.. most likely is the things that happen on that day.. sometimes can even cry till i sleep cos i thinking of some sad tots..
thinking of how i have done tt day? how to improve... and blaa s its juz like that.. it feels good thinking in the dark..

tots will naturally come to your mind.. and yarh u will be thinking abt it. i often do that. sometimes i even think that what i had done is stupid. all my stupid actions caused tons of trouble. its not worth it at all. maybe i am should think more about others. but i often felt left out. often, i would be thinking have i done things that make people hate me? thinking more about others... i think i tried... but isit my best? my best... i dun even noe wad is my best. i think that one's best will never be done lest he does not wan to lose something very badly.

just before going overseas that night, i have been thinking that is it worth to quarel with my parents so i can go for farewell? i was like thinking but its farewell, farewell is not ordinary.. its leaving someone and going overseas, there's alot of chance isn't it? i noe im desperate for it but there's nth i can do.

sometimes, when there are tons of homework yet to be completed, and it is already pass midnight, i carn dun sleep. i feel like sleeping but i carn sleep. its the kind of feeling that its very hard to explain in words. u juz somehow won feel safe and got the urge to get up and finish up the work and yet you carn concentrate. in the end i will be there flipping here and there, thinking how, how leh? tmr sure die liao..

i am those kind of person who does not like to hand in things late. in primary school, i dun blog, i dun use msn.. i just a typical student. handing in homework on time and everything. spelling test were no problem because i got study. i m just those type of person.. i am very scared of scoldings. i will surely cry coz i will feel very regretfull even though its not my fault or wad.. maybe you guys dun understand but thats me. i never really tell my feelings to others before. up till now, feelings are kept in heart... where no one can ever find it. sometimes, me myself dun even noe wad is my real thoughts.

sometimes, i am just too tired and just happen to slump into my bed and i am asleep. but the most trouble to get to sleep is when you are sick. there are many types of sickness. but to me, blocknose and internal injury is the ones that is chasing my night away. making me unable to sleep. when you have block nose, you will be there trying to breathe and its damn difficult for you to get some sleep. meanwhile internal injury, i usually hide it from my parents... actually, i hide all my sickness from my parents. my parents often say if you are not feeling well must speak out dun just suffer there. but somehow, i dun like to tell them i am sick or wad. maybe i do not wan them to worry about me or waste money on me.. i dunno but i juz dun like to tell them i am sick or injured..

i rmb that time i am overseas.. i woke up, feeling like i have fever and feel like vomiting.. well i dint tell my parents. until when we went down to eat breakfast my mum realised i dun wan to eat.. haiz. i dun wan them to noe.. somehow its tiu lian.. i dunno i juz hide my feelings..

sometimes, sleeping is just so hard that i would be imaginating me as a patient in the hospital, unconscious lying there and all sorts of injury over you... then somehow i just slept like that. i noe its weird. but its my method of sleeping.. different people have different methods of sleeping in which mine is a stupid one. i don't noe whether there's any other people who sleeps just like me..

but back to the start, i still like to think before sleeping. staring into the darkness and thinking of what you have done right and wrong, revising through wad u have learn. but somethings bad is that when you suddenly rmb that you forgotten how to do something that you have just learn, you just jump up and start thinking and in the end you will get nervous and you will start switching on the lights and ransack the notes and things.. but this condition its only when there some kind of test tmr on this..

sometimes i really think that i am born for nothing... actually for something.. to cause suffering and waste everything that is given to me... i dunno who will read this but i dun care thats just who i am.. a person who likes to think at night.. or rather a pooh who likes to think at night..

2006-12-23T13:01:00.000-08:00

unable to blog on thur and fri for some reasons..
****
thursday.. went this dunno wad place at bukit gombak...
do long yue... at first dun feel lyk doing long but then when they do lyk very fun lyk tt, i feel lyk doing long liao.. haiz.. but they all carry until very tiring.. but i still wan to do long.. then i did long yue in the end.. doing the da bo.. why muz be rythmic one arh? haiz..nvm.. then me and hong spent abt 2 hours there?! trying to have mo4 qi4 in each other's bo-s.. then finally can liao.. then we learn the starting part and the third part which the person called it as UFO.. yarh.. very fun... the guy very funny.. haha.. i hit the bo until horh, my hand blackgreen? (direct translate from or-ceh) aiyah bruise to be simple.. then oso got some sort of rashes but not rashes .. then we went down to first floor toilet some sqm went to change then me, hong and kathy feel very sian so we went to hide from sqm, taking pinky bag along.. so they wun go away w/o us.. but they not fun one lorh nvr go search for us.. haiz..
****
friday arh, got dalt.. first half an hour of the dalt we were told not to play the ba and all those noisy stuff.. coz of sec 1 registration.. but then b4 tt, we got pt oso.. but is do 20 pumping, 20 kruches , 20 jumping jacks and 10 leg raisers thingy.. and when doing the leg raisers thingy, my leg almost got cramp.. its pain sia. so lyk.. sqm say do half way, stomach pain.. i dun feel the stomach pain coz all my attention is on my leg.. then cannot run at first to water break.. so skip there lorh.. then after tt, fall in leg pain lyk siao.. but later its much better liao..
***
yarh then today morning went to tidy up my room.. my room damn messy larh.. haiz.. so yarh spend alot of time and effort.. yeh.. go eat liao

2006-12-23T00:40:00.000-08:00

Haiz.. today, kana get scolded by ma lorh.. sian diao.haiz.. I rather dun get wad I get to get freedom… but I noe.. ,she scolded me coz I came home late.. , tt she is for my sake.. I noe she does not wan me to turn bad.. haiz.. I noe all tt but juz how come … haiz nvm. She oso say if i like tt go everyday, she going to call the school liao.. haiz.. and wad does tt mean? the to will noe.. and wad does tt mean? will banned alot of competitions and parades and... haiz.. and still wad does tt mean? unit carn get gold.. haiz.. all becoz of me then cannot get gold.. not worth it.. really. so how leh.. haiz.. zhen shi de.. dun dare to tell her abt tmr is not go school but mrt.. later she will ask why leh?? where got np at outside, in school cannot arh.. then will say want to call to ask.. haiz.. and she say join this school fan er bian cheng zhe yang... haiz..
haiz..today dalt learn new stuff.. got the shi how to pei the gu.. the luo arh.. and revise cai qing sequence.. managed to rmb.. yay...
no xin qing to write liao.. juz now write halfway ma ask me wad time i go school.. then i tell her everything..dad beside her really go say "where got like tt one?! i wan to go call school liao."
waah.. why like tt.. haiz.. nvm. shall not blog liao as in for now... kaes so yarh.. tts it for today's blogging

2006-12-19T05:09:00.000-08:00

haiz..
overseas from 6-17 december then so many things happen
wad the lorh..haiz.. ytd mon, go for sqd meeting.. started toking abt wad happened..
start toking at one go.. make me so confused..in the end leave them toking abt it then i there sian sian...how i wish wad really happened.
haiz..ytd quite tired larh.. coz.. 12am of monday juz reach home so i slept at 1am+ then wake up then go sqd meeting.. almost got scolded cos go to school right after i came home..haiz.
then ma say "why bro np dunnid to go so many times, i nid to go so many times? muz well in the beggining dun join np.. i wan to go ask ur teacher liao harh?! if u still go out everyday lyk tt then nxt year wan me to quit"
wad the larh.. haiz.. gen sqm zai yi qi you cuo arh.. haiz.. why no freedom one..
actually is ok liao larh.. after overseas she less fierce than before.. dunno why leh
haiz..during overseas..surely not good..
i hate this overseas trip..but there's good point too
but then horh keep thinking abt farewell and sqm..
then horh..why i oso dunno keep hearing np songs.. on the train got, on the shopping mall oso got, on the tv got...on plane oso..haiz..everywhere got.. then i keep thinking abt sqm.. the first day is juz sitting plane and train.. then nxt 2 days go wuyishan ... i quite lyk it there larh.=) but then later horh go fuzhou sit this train.. haiz ling wo shiwang de..squeeze here sqeeze there..
then fuzhou first day got fever larh wah lao.. then feel lyk vomitting.. fan wei i think.. then carn eat food.. no appetite to eat. see food feel lyk puking.. haiz.. act now still abit. tiny little bit larh..haiz...quite sian toking abt overseas..shall not tok abt it..
kaes and then today got act.. wah damn tired.. come home haven really rest then tmr got dalt... day after tmr got xtra drill prac.. today... act..arh. morning chu forgot bring beret.. ask ma to bring my bro one..coz home quite near.. in the end? get scolded.. haiz.. wan to help sqm oso cannot.. so in the end owe 75..
then practice 3rd class.. task is to march to the bench.. waah very far leh..then keep knocking on to the wall larh.. then i suddenly forget task is with wad one. is with 5 stationery or wad.. then think think think then i think should be 5 coz carn think of any..but correct larh.. then tt time report.. dunno why ma'am laugh leh.. make me laugh oso. i think its becoz i rolling my eyes or something? if i did i dint realise i m rolling them. haiz. then hong turn.. very funny she was here nodding here head up and down again. then ma'am ask me out to teach camelia bang.. dunno wads wrong with her's leh.. but it juz isn't right.. i tot bang will surely bang one wad how come no matter how she bang oso cannot bang properly. then later is knots and campcraft stuff. i think juz came back frm china, tou nao bu qing xing or sth? i got change my balck socks into white socks.. but then somehow still change very fast. then sqm changing.. then they forget shoe back so i ran down and take.. then i took wrong one but still in use so i nid to run down and take again.. wah.. then i come up they can go liao.. so run down again.. cos late liao.. then run up to np room.. then fall in i wah panting lyk siao.. then ma'am wan to see sock.. then i realise i am wearing white socks when i aren't suppose to be.. haiz so fall out run down change and run up again.. wad the.. then go back they say go the hole there.. then run there again.. then work play train rest tt time, haiz.. already out of breathe liao cannot shout lorh.. haiz.. in conclusion.. i ran down, ran up, ran down, ran up, ran down, ran up(to np room) , ran down, ran up, ran to hole.. then expect to shout wptr.. haiz.. this is waah.. kaes..
o yea.. i think tt my cough coming back.. haiz..
yea cough jiu cough lorh but i scared later the mr cough will happen again and there will be epidemic and hai everyone.. haiz..but now not so serious so still can.. so drink more water can le.. i think..xp..
kaes go prepare shiku all these le..

long time no blog

2006-12-03T01:55:00.000-08:00

hmmph..its seems that i haven blog for a very very very long long time..
act for one day larh.=.-
so hmmph.. today no chinese tuition..
wake up, go out eat breakfast..
then go home do SANA report..
then hmmph do then slack lorh.. lyk use paint to draw adm again but different version. set it as background pic for my acc in the com..quite nice larh=)
bleahs.. kaes..flying soon..
why leh.. i dun wan to fly leh..
why my wings so bu ting hua arh? haiz...
even my brain cannot control so mei ban fa. still fly then stop somewhere then fly back lorh..
then fly lai fly qu.. in the end leh, cannot go for farewell..haiz..
i wan to go leh.. why muz my wings be so naughty harh?
haiz.. this carn be explained... seems lyk the wings are controling me.
wings arh wings arh.. dun flap can?
flap flap flap, tire yourself for wad? no good one u noe..? later u freeze then how? there very cold one leh..
haiz.. naughty wings..
" i dun wan fly!! i dun wan fly! dun fly to china, can?"
from the song: i wanna fly
haiz.. but lyrics carn be change so easily so how can i stop the wings..
haiz.. haiz.. why lyk tt?

_-* dEspErAte WaNtInG tO gO fOr FaReWeLL*-_

2006-11-30T18:53:00.000-08:00

today!! hah.. go bukit timah reserve.. feel left our as usual..haha but its ok=) cos later manage to communicate quite well yeaXD.. yup..
wah today climb the hill lyk not normal main road lorh.. its siao larh..walk so long.. climb until very tiring.. u noe we climb for more than 1 hour??!! yea.. then horh, we walk up this chao steep de stairs.. omg its lyk u look up to the stairs right, its never ending... trust u! no adults with us oso lorh! we go through catchment path, to blabla bla.. then walk the dairy farm loop. dairy farm loop is the one tt kills lorh.. wahh siao le larh.. u look down horh, waah so many steps then think going to reach le but den horh when u look up horh , Wad the u noe wad? more steps then u look down lorh.. really its nvr ending.. then climb up legs tired lyk siao larh.. its juz damn tiring.. nvr ending climbing.. its really quite impossible to say it out how it feel lyk but u muz go experience urself. its really siao one. tell u. then the road so hard to walk u look to ur side horh, if u slip, u die!! omg this is really so ricky larh and tiring.. i think tmr i will have muscle ache..
its really hard to tell u all wad the experience its lyk.. but after climbing horh, i feel tt i got a lot of cheng jiu gan larh.. its damn great lorh.. then still nid to walk down waah leg carn move le hai walk down and still nid to walk home.. this is damn crazy lorh haiz.. but haha now tt i m home, i am very you cheng jiu gan leh!! its damn nice.. feels a bit lyk trekking. yarh...but we dint bring sticks and stuff larh..haha
yay! but then horh after tt i dint do excercise lyk i planned haiz.. coz see the friend and friedn bro play the com.. haha.. act 5/6 wan to go run one rite? but raining..haiz but nvm larh its ok.. since i excercise so much on morning le..=) hehe... SANA thing haiz. received sqd message tt nid report!! wad the... i haven even finish giving out the questionnaire lorh how to do report.. muz be siao le.. haiz.. itz really busy now lorh.. holiday lyk nvr holiday lyk tt..haiz.. seems i have to go do report first.. kaes so maybe later then blog again?

2006-11-29T22:57:00.000-08:00

*this post gonna be blueish*
kaes so this post is abt tmr's plan=D
tmr gonna be a fresh and new day to me=)
yea hoo
yeap tmr is sort of a sporty day to me.
tmr, wake up brush teeth, eat... yea these are normal
then go climb bukit timah nature reserve with bro, bro friend and bro friend bro.
dunno wad we gonna do there but its sure excercising. i am so excited man!
walking backward uphill will be trilling too! *woots*
then we will have to walk walk, run run, jump jump.. woah thats completely great man!
but then horh later i will feel sort of left out cos i dunno them. haiz.
Planning to give the SANA thingy to my bro friend but heard tt she's from SJAB so most likely she attended the course before so should give her bro instead then. haiz.. this SANA thingy right, i only complete one lorh.. and monday nid to pass up liao le larh.. why so fast arh? 2 weeks juz pass lyk tt?!! and yea my homework horh oso die le lorh. haven even done a single piece. haiz.haiz.... why lyk tt? o yea why am i toking abt all these stuff? i should be toking abt tmr's plan.
kaes then going up hill yarh.. and then go down hill.blabla.. oh yarh before going to bukit timah nature reserve, me and bro will walk to his friend's house which is at bukit timah plaza which is also a distance. so walk walk walk then also excercise larh.. after tt, still nid to walk to the reserve..haiz.. then require somemore strength. i think by the time i reach there right, i am already tired out. aiyah i where got so lousy? my steminar not so lousy lorh..haha.
yea then after tt, go home, eat lunch then maybe sleep a while.. then wake up at abt 4 lyk tt. then do some dumbell excercise. cos horh, mus train muscle so as to have strength to carry the shi larh.. actually the shi is quite light larh, but horh not that light larh..but then carry very long will tired. wads more is we onli do qishi only so there's still alot of bufa.. so haiz...nid strength.. but horh later train too much untill got huge muscles larh.. girls having muscles is definitely ugly. yikes.. haah but tts what i think ..maybe the truth isnt so? wait i should stop toking abt muscles..
kaes so after tt, i will do sit up, pumping, jumping jacks, nuckles... yea sounds great... then rope skipping.. muz train sit up lorh.. i sit up do lyk dunno how many then cannot do le.. anw, my sit up is damn lousy can le.. tt time itc require us to do 50 sit up in one station rite, i dunno lyk do 15 tired le.. then i do sit up i keep banging my head against the floor lorh.. tts lyk oww>< muscles=")...">
then after tt, at abt 5/6 pm, go running. yeaXD.. run run run wippee. train steminar... so nxt time pt run dunno how many rounds, how fast oso will be not tired one. =) run run against the winds ahh... so refreshing.. hehe refreshing this word remind me of swimming. i feel lyk swimming now lorh. juz jump into the clear crystal blue water and swim.. waah so nice. then can go sauna... yea last time i went sauna with my 5th aunt. stay in the room very sian but sweat lyk siao.. we stay till abt 50 plus degree celcius lorh.. then later go out of the room lyk waah outside damn col larh.. after tt go the swimming pool waterfall thingy where water splash against our backs.. phew so nice.. ahh kaes i should stop toking abt swimming..
kaes then after running then go rest.. then at nite will start pia ing le.. homework.. tons of homework yet to be completed.. haiz.. die le larh..nxt week lyk go overseas le.. then how to finnish my homework in time? crazy larh... haiz..kae so tmr nite hw.. then sleep yea=) tmr's tmr's nite arh... tmr then say larh..haha.. its damn late now.. so nitez..=)

2006-11-29T22:41:00.000-08:00

today arh... got song and cheer session lorh. after tt get extra drill prac. then we have sqd talk with sqms=)..
song and cheer session.. sang alot of songs... actually is only songs,no cheers. cheers muz go cheers to cheer..kaes nvm haha.. erm then we sang many oldies.. my parents all sing these song since i m young so i m ra ther familiar with the tunes. but the thing with me is that, i dunno the song title. i nid ppl to start the tune then i noe the tune.. so when ma'am ask if noe, i oso dunno whether i noe or not. then have to sing some jay chou songs... thanks to my bro i regconised them haha..but i dunno the lyrics, juz humming the tune. managed to sing quite okayly.. (wad a broken english is tt?) but now harh, i think i forget how to sing the zhang3 sheng1 le... dunno wad nid to require us to clap de lorh..haiz. forgot le how to rmb.. tune very not catchy. demonstrate so many times le still horh, dunno how to sing.=.= but overall its ok=) yay! but nid to rmb all the songs. i carn even rmb which tune is for which song how i rmb the song..? i very shi1 bai4 lorh. bleahs.. though i cannot go for farewell, i will still go rmb the songs de=) BUT... I WAN TO GO FAREWELL... waah*sobs* why lyk tt? huh...?!! i wan to go, cannot go. why pian1 pian1 lyk go overseas meet farewell. very sian u noe??!! haiz, but somethings is cannot change de larh . so juz HAIZ..
then drill prac. first half an hour seem lyk eternity to all. we tot right, its lyk over for very long le..in the end wad? only half an hour lorh. crazy le larh..but then later the time lyk pass so fast?!## lyk one hour over.. when the half an hour pass so slow? maybe becos voice training larh. haha voice training bery fun. we oso learn some mistakes in pronouncing some commands.. lyk kanan, kiri, ker blakang not blakan..(wad eva its spelled as) and stuff.. sqm very funny. from one end of net ball court shout to the other end... quite far but at least better than quadrangle larh. quadrangle one end to the other then lyk hmmph...no comments... after tt, we split into groups. lyk very small grp, consist of abt 3/4 per group. my group got shipmate and mama. we practice sizing.. i getting to lyk sizing lorh=) very fun. or rather i like it in the begining le but i love it now? haha not love larh juz lyk it..=) shipmate you3 dian3 jing3 zhang1.. i oso wei4 ta1 jing3 zhang3 lorh... trying to mumble to her wad the command is.. haiz.. yea..today our sqd do alot of mumbling... o yea b4 vouce training we oso got practice sizing. tt time i finish sizing le, then ker kanan lurus rite,then first time correct, i noe tt.. but then horh, move so slow then move wrong place, tthen move back.. haiz a bit err so i samula so sqm think they do wrongly..so in the end do so many times then get back to the first one which is correct..=) kae back to the group part.. then do finish sizing nothing to do..then ma'am say lets' crap.. haha but then we tok abt the wad eopa or dunno wad larh forget le.. so nxt yr, nid to invite and pull as much sec ones in as possible.. haha lets have a target our sqd shall at least pull 15!! haha nvm tts wad i think only cos each person pull one or two then can le wad.. haha. kae then lyk soon after then xtra drill prac finish le lorh.. but horh, the sun very strong.. my dad say i chao ta le. then sunday pot eyedrops that control the eye degree thingy horh. it will be very sai4 for me for few days. then horh, juz now very hard to say timing when eyes are trying to see the surroundings and then when squint eyes, u tend to show ur teeth then when you show ur teeth how to tok properly? haha nvm.. juz saying some logical stuff.
squad talk... tok abt who we represent as in.. lyk i look lyk which ma'am as in not look but then way we tok or our attitude... juz very funny when sqm debate tt they dun look lyk a certain ma'am and think differently frm others. then horh, yingsiu,katherine and chuxi started doing the leg thingy as in piling up their legs and shake it all about.. very silly though. then we tok abt wad each of us is lyk.. then give each of us a "prize" in sarcarsm... mc sure got lots of prizes.. and we oso tok abt mc's nick called pipa. i think its very err.. not to criticize her but the name she choses causes hair to stand.. pipa sounds lyk those u noe instruments..then some sqm think that its lyk the medicine: pipagao...haha very lame..mc say its the pipa nige long ting dong tt pipa.. but its sounds very yucky.. yeh very oldy. tts why mc got the lao3 tu3 jiang3.. haha. jiayuin who is as usual zi highing was saying it sounds lyk fang pi that pi... ERR.. its really zi high lorh then she was laughing at her own joke.. tts why she is the most zi high person..XD. bleah bleah.. shall not tok wad i am.. i dun think i am wad i am lorh.. its very opposite.. and yeah..juz very not true..? i not those ___ person larh.. i put __ coz nobody shall noe wad i m.. but i dun think i m tt lorh.. haiz.. nvm.haiz nvm sqd talk anything else to say? yea.. alot of things.. but kaes.. but too much and tt will cause overflowing of words in my blog.. and it will look damn wordy.. so i shall not tok abt sqd tok... ...
shall stop this post le.. and start another one, toking abt tmr's plan and stuff..=) it shall be a new day.. cool and refresh kae i shld stop if not there wouldn.' be a next post.

2006-11-28T19:21:00.000-08:00

Quizle!!

The ones with an X next to it means that I’ve done it!

[ ] I am bisexual or homosexual.
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol. (yea..juz a little sip)
[ ] I’ve run away from home.
[ ] I have lied to my parents about where I am. (y shld i?)
[x] I don’t like Bush because from what I hear, he is dumb.
[ ] I don’t like Bush with my own reasons to back it up.
[ ] I am for Bush.
[ ] I listen to political music.
[x ] I collect comic books.(yea.. of coz lorh)
[ ] I shut others out when I’m depressed. (itz rude, u noe tt)
[x] I open up to others easily.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world
[x]I watch the news.
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I own an iPod or MP3 (as if i dun wan one?)
[ ] I own something from Hot Topic
[x] I love Disney Movies.
[x] I am a sucker for hair/eyes
[ ] I don’t kill bugs. (i kill all sots of bugs if u dunno)
[ ] I curse regularly. (i am not so bad lorh)
[ ] I paid for that cell phone ring.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic. (at least not yet)
[ ] I have “x”s in my screen name.
[x] I’ve slipped out an “lol” in a real conversation. (u should noe me well enough)
[ ] I love Spam.
[ ] I bake well.(nah, my bread once turned into some inedible stuff)
[ ] I would wear pajamas to school. (huh? as if would allow)
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie.
[x] I have a job. (being a nynp cadet is my profession)
[ ] I love Martha Stewart.(do i noe him/her??)
[ ] I am in love with love.(wad mean this?)
[x] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS. (hAhA..dUh!)
[x] I am self conscious. (if not would i still be here?)
[x] I like to laugh.(who likes to cry?)
[ ] I smoke a pack a day.
[ ] I loved Perks of Being a Wallflower.
[ ] I loved Go Ask Alice.
[ ] I have cough drops when I’m not sick.(no..definitely not, i m a transfer agent who does her part properly..=D)
[ ] I can’t swallow pills. (nvr knew someone dunno how to swallow pills)
[ ] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem( nvr tried)
[ ] I eat fast food weekly.
[ ] I have many scars. (wad do you mean by many??)
[x] I’ve been out of this country. ( i m not a nerd)
[x] I believe in ghosts. (hehe at times larh)
[ ] I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[ ] I am really ticklish.
[ ] I see a therapist.
[x] I love white chocolate. (they r juz so nice=])
[x] bite my nails. (yea used to..)
[x] I am comfortable with being me.
[ ] I play video games.
[x] I’m single ( i m in my teens now duh!)
[ ] I’m in a relationship
[x] Gotten lost in your city.
[ ] Saw a shooting star
[ ] Been to the united states
[ ] I Had serious Surgery(maybe..but who knows?)
[x] Gone out in public in your pajamas (last time when i m sick)
[ ] I have Kissed a Stranger( i dare u to do tt)
[ ] Hugged a stranger (not me..my bro)
[ ] Been in a fist fight
[ ] Been arrested(for no reason?nah nah)
[x] Pushed all the buttons on an elevator (dun u think its fun?)
[ ] Made out in an elevator
[x] Swore at your parents
[ ] Kicked a guy where it hurts
[ ] Been close to love (or in love)
[ ] Been to a casino(nah..too young)
[ ] Been skydiving
[ ] Broken a bone
[ ] Skipped school
[x] Flashed someone(i flashed to myself when bathing..)
[ ] Saw a therapist
[x] Done the splits (yea, done, in p1/2)
[ ] Played spin the bottle(what eva is tt, i dun play kiddy games)
[x] Gotten stitches (once on my nose or something)
[ ] Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
[x] Bitten someone(i bitten myself)
[ ] Been to Niagara Falls
[x] Gotten the chicken pox (yea... but tts when i m subconscious)
[x] Kissed a member of the same sex (dun u dare say u nvr?)
[ ] Crashed into a friend’s car
[ ] Been to Japan
[x] Ridden in a taxi
[x] Shoplifted (seriously, i think i did when i was in p1?)
[ ] Been fired(dun even have ajob)
[ ] Ever had a crush on someone of the same sex(i m not a lesbian)
[ ] Had feelings for someone who didnt have them back
[ ] Stole something from your job(told i dint have a job!)
[ ] Gone on a blind date
[x] Lied to a friend(yea haha)
[ ] Had a crush on a teacher(bleah...course not)
[ ] Celebrated mardigras in New Orleans
[ ] Been to Europe (yikes so far... nono)
[ ] Slept with a co-worker
[ ] Been married
[ ] Gotten divorced(how can i get divorced when i haven even get married)
[ ] Had children
[x] Saw someone dying on t,v (tv dramas?yes duh!)
[ ] Been to Africa
[ ] Driven over 400 miles in one day
[ ] Been to Canada (nope but my sqm is there now)
[ ] Been to Mexico
[x] Been on a plane (huh? then i fly out myself isit?)
[ ] Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
[ ] Thrown up in a bar (nvr been to a bar b4, juz to tell u)
[x] Eaten Sushi (er.. dun ask stupid questions)
[ ] Been snowboarding ( i nvr seen snow b4..even snow city's fake one)
[ ] Been Skiing
[ ] Met someone in person from the internet(do i look lyk one who does?)
[ ] Been to a moto cross show
[x] Lost a child ( yea right that would be me)
[ ] Gone to college
[ ] Graduated college
[ ] Done hard drugs (lyk wad?)
[x] Taken painkillers
[ ] Had someone cheat on you
[x] Miss someone right now (hehe...my sqm overseas and relative)

All the above stuff is over my whole life, and most things barely qualify. Don’t look at me like that!!

cross the road riddle!

2006-11-26T18:38:00.000-08:00

CROSS THE ROAD RIDDLE:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
Why did the fox cross the road?
Why did the gum cross the road?
Why did the deer cross the road?
Why did the starfish cross the road?
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
Why did the weasel cross the road twice?
Why did the turtle cross the road?
Why did the cow cross the road?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

2006-11-26T18:00:00.000-08:00

true enough, the trend happen again.. well it juz happen juz now at abt 5...
cough lyk siao?!## haiz.... i tot today can go swimming but my cuz dint come and cos of tt stupid Mr Cough. Mr Cough yarh, Mr Cough..ni3 ke2 yi3 bu2 yao4 si3 can2 zhe4 bu4 zou3 ma1,wo3 hen4 si3 ni3 le4...
tmr, got sqd meeting and OM meeting.... which shld i go? i long time cos of sqd meeting neglected OM meeting le... haiz.. but prefer to be with sqm(squadmate) than sqm(shipmate). coz always get sea sick with shipmates and a bit sian toking abt serious stuff. Though at times it quite fun larh.. so wad now...multiple choice question 50,50...
what will pooh got tmr?
1) OM meeting
2) sqd Meeting
answer: ( )
haiz so wad ? tikum tikum isit? if i dun go for OM meeting, then only 3 ppl going which is pertatic lorh. but then sqd meeting nicer leh... haiz..haiz.haiz...
then i shld say "mirror mirror on the wall, tell me which one is the better one of all?" isit?
as if it will reply lorh...crazy le larh.. such a decision is hard to make lorh...
tell me leh someone... *no reply*
got reply then scary le larh.... haiz i am zi4 yan2 zi4 yu3- ing.

feeling desperate now..

2006-11-26T17:35:00.000-08:00

*****report of illness*****

FIRST RATED HATED ILLNESS IN POOH'S LIFE
Who: Mr Cough
What: huh? its a type of illness lorh
Where: where..hmmph. everywhere? somewhere? but not nowhere..duh!!
When: Ever since 2006, November.
Why: easy..because:
Mr cough causes>> Vomiting
>> Headache, dizziness
>> Fever
>> Fluu
>> Stomachache
>> Sorethroat
>> Unconciousness
>> Lost of voice and weird voice
Mr Cough dun allow one to eat:
= biscuits
= ice-cream
= Cold drinks
= mango
= snacks
= things that are bad for ur throat
= fried stuff
= negative medicine (which means.. [cough - (- medicine)]= +medicine)
so i nid to eat medicine

*****End of report*****

2006-11-25T18:09:00.000-08:00

non stop coughin..
trying to control not to cough by ren3ing....but haiz..always end out bursting
today, wanted not to cough..haiz..quite okay actually, but horh.
why pian1 pian1 on piano lesson cannot stop coughing...
o yea.. i realise this trend.. at about 4-6pm, somewhere in the middle...i will cough lyk mad.cannot stop. tts wad happen in piano lesson lorh..haiz..so suay leh..hope i can recover soon since i noe its impossible to go for farewell..maybe its not. but aiyah..dunno larh..

2006-11-25T14:16:00.000-08:00

Maybe its fate...
YEA.Precisely.its all heaven's will and fate tt brought me here, into this world and lead me... to this overseas thingy.Seems tt i carn change it. maybe if i change it, things tt is supposed to be lyk tt, will not be it is now and the world will be in upside down. tts why its supposed to be lyk tt. maybe i m brought to have a relaxation. yea maybe..maybe its lyk tt. but why me? haiz..told u is fate..fate..
FATE this word. i hated alot now. all bcos of fate..tt cos trouble to ppl. fate..fate..whats so fantastic abt it? huh? fate feeling so happy cos carn go liao larh..harh! u happy, i sad.. why lyk tt? nvm its no use blaming to fate..cos its juz a believe, a word..tt changes ppl's lives..fate..

2006-11-25T08:36:00.000-08:00

wad i really wan is... to go for the farewell party... but its really disappointing to noe that my parents still dun allow me to go no matter wad..
i dunno why and wads wrong? but its really, well, sad. i juz wan to go. i rather forbid my chance of going overseas to go for this farewell party. REALLY. but still i was not given a chance not to go overseas.. why leh? haiz..
if i continue coughin till the going overseas day, would they not go overseas?
if yes, i would really rather continue coughin then. Though its currently my first hated illness. it cause headache, sorethroat, stomachache,blocknose, vomiting at times.. haiz. but horh..if this were to allow me to go for farewell, i dun mind. really i dun mind at all. but the problem is. is it really going to help me go farewell? haiz... things were twirling in my head lyk a tonado, making me giddy.
why muz it fall on the farewell party? why? juz why..
cough- though its rather sick for me to have cough. (sick in the sheng bing not the sick..) preferably, i wan to get over it though. but then thinking of going to farewell party, i dunno wads my decision. wad isit tt i wan to go farewell party so much? actually, i oso dunno. u ask me why, i tell u none of ur business. cos i really dun really understand why i anticipate this party so much tt i prefer myself to be sick.. really why huh? but i juz dunno so dun ask me. sometimes it will be better to let it go. but i dun think i can let it go so easily this time round... haiz..things couldn't possibly get worser or better.. they juz stay as it is which is a bad thing to me..

I Wan To GO!

2006-11-24T09:24:00.000-08:00

things that happened today... i can only say haiz....
noe rite, STUPID COUGH larh..
in DALT cough lyk siao. make me look so..HAIZ...
tupid leh...cough cough cough.. now sqm oso hav cough.
crazy liao larh! very sorry leh. maybe i shld not cum today..
but horh, HAIZ!!
i dun come, will hai4 sqm..
so how leh? i cum, oso hai4 sqm.. wad is this?
HAIZ!!
dun cum will hai4 them get scolded cos the cards with me..
HAIZ!!!
but then i cum,
will make more sqm sick...
PT, yi bian sing cheer a bia cough.. but its ok larh..
today PT some how...quite ok leh.. HAIZ..
maybe cos i coughing all the way the cannot cheer..?!#?
but i wan to cheer leh..
HAIZ!! HAIZ!!
wad lorh... its reallt very haiz..
aftertt, after OM..
cough lyk siao again..
why leh..dunno larh. afternoon always lyk tt leh
cannot stop leh..but wan to stop..
cough to much will cause you to feel lyk puking..
almost puke lorh..HAIZ!!
and den hor, i wan to go for the farewell party!!..
=(... ask my mum:
can dun go overseas or not, my bro say i crazy
ask:
then i cum back myself, he say i feng le...say tt ask things tt are impossible.
very impossible meh?
buy air tickets, can dun go one wad.
cum back myself i noe a bit risky but why not?
reasonable isn't it...
HAIZ!!..i really wan to go lorh
*sobs*
then tt time i bathe..
dunno wad larh
but i go put the soap and rub it on my head lyk shampoo lyk tt.
crazy le larh!! its really HAIZ lorh....
waahh..HAIZ!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry for the cough epidemic!!

2006-11-22T22:37:00.000-08:00

dint mean to..
DINT WANT To...
why?
WHY?
i DUN WAN
shld not..
muz not...
a terrible mistake..
haiz..
why?
if only..
i noe...
that , that cough can spread lyk tt?
does cough spread lyk tt?
haiz..
i shldn't go for act
and pass it to everyone..
shld not have...
haiz..
why i go arh?
why arh? cos so much trouble...
now sqm all have cough..
sian larh
so sorry..
really lorh..
why muz i go????
WHY!!!
sorry!!
SORRY! SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! SORRY!
SORRY! SORRY!

waah.. sorry..=(
so sorry..
shld not have gone..
should not have gone!
argh!! sorry!!
sorry sqm..

CouGh??

2006-11-22T06:54:00.000-08:00

cough..sian..today cough lyk siao??!# afternoon... started coughing. cannot stop. wan to drink water. unable to. hard to breathe. mc started saying funny stuff.make me. even more harder to stop coughing. stop le. start again.cough till bus stop. haiz.
today on msn. i realised sqm oso got cough, shld not have gone act on tues. make them oso have cough.regretted now. but i will not dun go for act for no reason even if i sick. but i go le. give virus to everyone. haiz. so sorry larh..... very nei4 jiu4 now...
got new specs today..=)yay.. wohoo! no more oldies specs..SO round lorh.. lyk nerd lyk tt. hate it. yippeee!! yaHO!!
nvm..sian..cough cough

2006-10-26T07:26:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since I had been blogging. For what ever reason, I also have not touch the com for a very long time. This may be something good and bad. Well, it is good cos I am not addicted to the com like i used to be. If you might not noe, I dun use to chat and use the com much. Last time, I am a very quiet girl not to say that I am very noisy now. My friend from my P5 cum 6 who is still my classmate said tt i have change much. I know it too. The me last time... seldom hang out with ppl. This made me feel so left out. I decided to make a change and so well thats what i am now.
Not touching the com also , shall we say allow?, allow me to get outdated. Things in the squad mail, blog and stuff, I would not noe unless i go and look. For some reason, its not tt I dun wan to use the com but my bro is juz hanging around with it.
These few days, present making. Been present all the sessions but not today... You noe..maybe you dun...i have been catching up with mr flu. I hate to catch him no one...but well i guess its not a choice either. I fear to have a weird voice at choral nite... hahas..nvm anw they dint hear my actual voice b4... I wan to go but hmmph.. cannot leh.
Going for holiday in december... I dun wan to!! not bcos i dun like going overseas for some fun.. but who would wan to miss a very memorable party? i feel lyk juz staying at home and not going for holidays.. isit possible? i dunno.
Ytd, captains ball. Not really good games.. got some unexpected happenings. Ball hit my face? or isit my mouth? wad eva.. then my mouth bleed... Oww how pain is tt? i dun really noe as i somehow was so aggitated or wad. I juz carn really rmb wad happen. some how friend's hand hit mine in the end my mouth got scratch too... it bled too but not as serious. Tried to talk properly.. guess i succeeded?
Its quite late now. Thousand of activites going up next. Haiz..nitez.. AAhhchoo..nvm hahas..lame

FuNtImE=)

2006-10-11T03:55:00.000-07:00

exams over le! tt y i m here.. if not i wun touch the com..sheesh....i haven do anything to my birthday present....and children's day present...

I actually got presents frm my pri sch teacher... so happy! as in children's day..The present also suiits me cos right, its all pooh de!! got sticker, notebook, pen, hankechief?XD.. anyway got all sots of pooh stuff... i love the sticker alot..=) its very nice..

wad else to say..not really much larh....hehe..so i will be writing oni when i find something to say..=P

A Birthday of Surprises and shock,,

2006-09-16T02:25:00.000-07:00

Ytd I had the WORST and BEst birthday eva! Having a geog quiz on that day was not all. I still had tons of homework and realised that i brought the maths file. Crap larhz... In the morning, I tot my family members forgot my birthday. Got so dejected n disppointed. Got to skool damn late at 6.50.(maybe to me its late). Gone straight to GO. Charmaine not there... weird. but she comes later cos she tot i will go up put my back first. expected a birthday greeting but dint. rush homework when got back to class. see everione studyin geog and i haven study. got very stress cos they so yong gong. No birthday greetings yet... My birthday seem to be long forgotten. Haiz. Dun expect anything either cos aiya..primary school oso lyk tt. shi wang ..totally
watch a movie durin pssg relaxed my mind=) then got math. Tok abt mensuration again. Confused with the volume of a sphere. Mind full with question marks. ask for xtension luckilly can if not i m dead.stayed in recess and do hw.. then got lang arts lesson. GOT time trail compre..In my birthday u noe??!! doing half way someone sang happy birthday song in other class. I felt so jealous. after lang arts..sudddenly my class sing happy birthday! So it was not forgotten after all..I suddenly felt so happy
chinese after lang arts.nth much happen. lunch oso busy doing hw then give up half way and revise geog carn rmb anything...keep hearing class mate saying M-I-SS-I-SS-I-PPI, M-I-SS-O-U-R-I and then jumpin abt..
see the geog paper lyk siao lyk tt... but so lucky that i pass
then got surprise present frm classmate aftr skool..actually not really surprising that i saw then trying to keep it frm me..then i noe liao..hax.
still rushin my work lyk siao..but managed to finish it yay=)
there goes my day..

2006-09-14T22:57:00.000-07:00

This is bad.. I am still doing my hw...tmr still got geog test. It seemed lyk my bdae totally sux. im feelin sad now..y muz there be so much hw when EOY is reaching and we carn even revise when we haven finish our work..? I dun understand and dont noe how to do certain questions. My ~~ wun help me. say tt nvr learn b4 but already in sec3...dun bother to think one lorh. WHY muz ~~ be lyk tt? is the whole world's ~~ lyk tt?
Ytd my ~~ hitted me so hard with a pole and say he oni use a little strength. isn't fit to be a np cadet larh..I really hate this its goin to be 11 and an hour later will be my birthday.. I dun look forward for it any more. I prefer to have happy days than to have such yucky bdaes...
I lyk ytd's corperate video! its fun sitting with ma'ams and toking and runnin here and there and saying jiayou. Its very slack though but i enjoyed it. Its oni when the part where we do drills, which isn't correct, where we got to run here and there more. Haiz..so sad my mum having some sore throat or something.. hope she gets better..dint get to eat my cupcakes i left especially for her. My ~~ dun bother to eat ..argh. In the end, i eat almost all by myself and some to my dad. Damn tired now.. haven got enuf sleep i guess..hope i can sleep but carn.. duh haven complete hw! betta get my hands busy now...

Excited

2006-09-14T18:51:00.000-07:00

Yipee..i lookin forward to tmr as its my birthday.. feel very weird with my bro at my side now..carn have freedom typing wad i wan..haiz..nvm tt all bb

Late at NIght

2006-09-09T23:48:00.000-07:00

The time is 11.43 now. I just found out it was this late cos I am busy with this new blog. Its not completed yet but it is counted as one of my most successful one. The tag board and comments part still need some touch up... I planned to sleep early but well.. haiz... Wonder how's my birthday's gonna be like. School kanna reopen soon then EOY will come followed by TDT. I had decided to study hard. I can't do badly now again like I had in term 3...Maybe cos of stress thats why. Currently engross in the comic book Shaman King but decide to save money. Toking abt saving money, I juz hope that I can help in saving money. Not buying comic, unnecessary stuff. Mum had spent lots of money on my bdae present. Regret it now. Don't want her to spent so much money on me... Going to be 12 midnight soon. Got to sleep...Good night！Sleep Tight!

Morning call~~

2006-09-09T10:30:00.000-07:00

Good Morning everyone! Haha. Juz had my piano lesson. Finds that today's lesson is very fun.Got to learn new song..very nice one=)called wad marriage blabla.. wadeva lorh. But its really nice. Toking abt pianos.. i have yet to give my sqdm a score. I owe her for more than a month le! Tmr I muz gif if not i will....i dunno wad i will do.=.=Later got chinese tuition which will be boring as usual. Going to read passages off the textbook and comprehensions. I suddenly rmb something funny ytd.My dog, rocky, Urinated on my bro's tuition teacher's shoe!!... and its was right into them lorh..Quite full. the surrroundings were wet too.=P
In the end nid to pour away the SUBSTANCE and wash it. Cos it won't dry...haha gtg tuition now..

Shall not fear of living

2006-09-08T23:39:00.000-07:00

Living a life is a obslacle given to us humans. No matter whether its tough or relaxing, happy or sad, giving up is the end of everything. I know very much that I am feeling very stress these days... Because of homework, test results, project, age difference which caused some problems. I know very well of these. A bear of a very little brain does not mean I does not have any problems. In my heart, I felt like bursting but I remained unshakened. The urge of crying had come upon me serveral times and no one knew what I am actually thinking now. No one. Yes, no one. BUT, I know that being pesimistic is not a thing. I shall be couragous and face what I need to face, never to give up no matter what. Life is just like that. We must face it or it will face you and take over you...